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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇲 has bookmarked:

If you get cremated after you die, you can be put into an hourglass and still participate in family game nights.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has copied:

Being shy is so annoying. Why is my chest hurting me, because I need to speak in public?

Someone from 🇲🇭 has downloaded:

Next on Tiny Houses: A family of 6 moves into a boat emoji.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

Don’t study, get slutty!

Someone from 🇵🇪 has bookmarked:

Gonna spend today following my cats into the kitchen and meowing at them until they give me treats.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has viewed:

Having little kids is great because I love spending hundreds of dollars each week to feed my floor and my trash can.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has viewed:

Accordion to a recent survey, inserting musical instruments into sentences largely goes unnoticed.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has viewed:

Can someone write me a note to get out of being a responsible adult?

Someone from 🇨🇩 has downloaded:

If people love cheese so much, why are they mad when someone smells like cheese.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has copied:

My mental health is as reliable as a flashlight in a horror film.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,410

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Twitch:

I don’t have a nervous system, I am a nervous system.

Trending via X:

Not sure what’s longer: a microwave minute or watching a video while someone else is holding the phone, insisting it’s hilarious.

Going viral on X:

You’re old if you’re excited to learn how to play Mahjong.

Freshly posted on Discord:

I identify as a weather forecast: Anything’s possible.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

Schedule your appointment early in the month before your dentist starts fretting about their next boat payment.

Live now on Pinterest:

If I was a priest, I’d make my side of the confession booth really big so I could run around.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

We should be able to go to the bar and drink to watch Love Island, like men do with sports.

Spotted on Messenger:

I hate it when I check my transactions history, and everything adds up like damn, so no one stole from me.

Just landed via Messenger:

The older I get, the less surprised I’d be if a random body part just fell off one day.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

I have my own hand stamper at home so my coworkers will think I went someplace fun the night before.

Funny yard sign quotes

Funny yard sign quotes bring a splash of humor 🌟 and personality to any outdoor space 🌿. Whether you want to make neighbors chuckle 😂 or spark a smile from passersby 🚶‍♂️, these clever messages turn your yard into the ultimate conversation starter 🎉. Ready to add some wit and charm to your lawn? Get inspired and watch your curb appeal go from plain to playful in seconds! 😄✨

New funny yard sign quotes 👇

All funny yard sign quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

19 shares on Instagram this month:

Elevators frighten me. I take steps to avoid them.

53 shares on Reddit this month:

Men used to send love letters in the middle of wars, and now they think reassurance is too much effort.

61 shares on WeChat this month:

“You handled it so well.” Nah, I didn’t. I lost my spark, felt crazy, distanced myself from everyone, and hated myself.

81 shares on Snapchat this month:

Cynics are – beneath it all – only idealists with awkwardly high standards.

41 shares on Reddit this month:

Why is incognito mode always associated with freaky shit? I use it to search up very obvious questions, so there’s no record of me looking dumb.

44 shares on Threads this month:

Any tips on being smart? For someone just getting into thinking.

14 shares on LinkedIn this month:

There’s endless songs out there about love and pain and life, but basically only one about the wheels on the bus. Just goes to show you they nailed it the first try.

82 shares on Instagram this month:

Аbsolutely crazy to thіnk that Leonardo DіCaprіo’s future gіrlfrіend іs currently nervous for her fіrst day of kіndergarten.

34 shares on Telegram this month:

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but I think people who say ‘I don’t know who needs to hear this’ know exactly who needed to hear it.

27 shares on WhatsApp this month:

If I was a stray cat, I’d follow you home and let you domesticate me.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Researchers have discovered that birthdays are healthy. People who have more grow older.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

If chickens knew how good they tasted, they would understand.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I wanna be a jellyfish— no heart, no brain, no feelings, no pain— just blub blub blub.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

It really annoys me when people use the wrong word and don’t have the humidity to admit it.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Not to brag but I don’t even need meditation, my mind goes blank the second someone asks me for directions.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I just ordered a life alert bracelet, so if I ever get a life, I’ll be notified immediately.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

After smartphones, we never got pictures of Bigfoot anymore. You know why? That’s right: 5G killed all the Bigfoots.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve broken all my New Year’s Resolutions so now I’m moving on to laws of nature.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I feel like a credit card, cause I’m constantly being used irresponsibly.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Just got revenge on someone who wronged me many, many years ago. Never relax, I’m coming.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,698

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇻 has bookmarked:

The worst person to share a room with is someone who puts on 10 alarms 2 mins apart each, and wakes up at none.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has shared:

Ever read a post multiple times, still tilt your head and whisper, “What?!”

Someone from 🇪🇹 has downloaded:

What if they close grocery stores and we have to hunt for our food? I don’t even know where the little gummy bears live.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has viewed:

An article of clothing left on the floor long enough becomes clean again because the germs eventually get bored and leave.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has bookmarked:

“Do not touch” must be one of the scariest things to read in braille.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has copied:

I feel like we’re on like the 50th or 60th horseman of the apocalypse by now.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

11:00 am – Anything is possible. 3:00 pm – But not today.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has bookmarked:

Living la vida taco!

Someone from 🇸🇪 has shared:

Sex is great, but have you ever had your alarm go off and then realize you don’t have to get up today?

Someone from 🇹🇩 has copied:

I didn’t go to the Carribean, my tan is from standing in front of the rotisserie chicken at Costco.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Pinterest:

Ok, I cheated in school, but I did it the hard way and without AI.

Just shared via Telegram:

At my next job, I’m gonna lie about having a kid so I can leave the office anytime I want like everyone else with children.

Going bananas on Facebook:

It’s unfortunate that scrubbing the floors on your hands and knees is so much more effective than mopping.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

My daughter’s morning alarm is less to wake her up, and more to warn the rest of us.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Back to work after the long holiday weekend, so you’re finally away from the relatives you don’t like, and back with the co-workers you don’t like.

Going viral on TikTok:

I told the trees what you did. Be wary when you enter the forest next.

Going viral on WeChat:

Interviewer: So why do you want this job? Me: I don’t. I just need money.

Just landed via WeChat:

Heavy on the ‘mhm,’ cause people just be talking.

Going viral on YouTube:

I try to find the good in every situation. Wait, no – that was a typo. Food. I try to find the food in every situation.

Seen just now on Discord:

My favorite conspiracy theory is that things will get better.

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