Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

Age is just a number… that now takes a really long time to scroll to.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has shared:

That pen in the junk drawer that hasn’t been used in four years picked today to have an attitude.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has downloaded:

All right everyone, line up alphabetically according to your height.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has downloaded:

Lou Read is the name of my favorite musician and also the book I keep in the toilet.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has copied:

Threatening my wife with a tariff every time she makes fun of me.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has bookmarked:

Pretty sure they’re naming prescription drugs by just grabbing random Scrabble tiles. “Oh hey, Qdilrox sounds good.”

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

Penguins are just ducks going to a wedding.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has viewed:

Whatever you ask the Universe for under this post, you will get next week.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

I just sneezed into my elbow and now I’m waiting for a preschool teacher to praise me.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has bookmarked:

All of humanities problems could be solved with a large meteor.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

789 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,951

Funny Quotes Topics

13,923

Funny Quotes Images

10,951

23 minutes ago

3,424

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Reddit:

Turns out my superpower is the ability to go into incredible detail in completely the wrong direction.

Just shared via WeChat:

I went downstairs to get my charger. I came back up with a bowl of ice cream and no charger.

Shared recently on Reddit:

I’m 45% coffee, 40% wine and 6% cheese.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

The more I parent the more convinced I am that the ears on toddlers are purely for decoration.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

By the time I meet the right person, I’ll probably be the wrong person.

Going viral on Facebook:

It’s just a matter of time until they add “syndrome” after my name.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Forget Botox. If you really want to look younger, get braces.

Just shared via Twitch:

It’s crazy how social media convinced us that 15 likes aren’t enough. Imagine 15 people in real life telling you that you looked good.

Seen just now on Telegram:

I hope this email kills us both.

Reported on Discord:

Not again. I mean good morning.

I’m not lazy, I’m an inactivist.

6 months ago

I’m not lazy, I’m an inactivist.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Oh, I see what you did there! Embracing inactivity with style, huh? 😄 Why be labeled as lazy when you can proudly claim the title of an "inactivist" instead! Just remember, even the most dedicated inactivists need to get up occasionally to stretch those legs… and maybe grab a snack! 🛋️💤

humor, inactivist, irony, lazy, motivation, procrastination

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

789 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,951

Funny Quotes Topics

13,923

Funny Quotes Images

10,951

23 minutes ago

3,441

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇾 has downloaded:

I got us matching straight jackets for Christmas.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

“You let your cat on the bed?” I would put her on my life insurance.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

The world needs to chill out. There’s no way future history teachers can cram all this nonsense into a semester.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has downloaded:

Well, well, well, if it isn’t that thing I’ve been ignoring until it became a giant problem.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has shared:

I suffer from that syndrome where your neutral expression makes it look like you’re an angry serial killer.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

I can’t wait til I have hearing aids, so I can just turn them off when I’m tired of hearing everyone.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has bookmarked:

It’s so funny how every true crime documentary eventually devolves into a story about how the police botched the entire investigation.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has shared:

If I complain about being out of shape, I don’t actually want fitness tips and workouts to try. I just want to complain and remain out of shape. What is wrong with you people?

Someone from 🇭🇺 has downloaded:

Mister Sandman, bring me a meme. Make it the dumbest shit that I’ve ever seen.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has bookmarked:

A woman’s sigh can speak a 1000 words.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Messenger:

I don’t think I’d be so scared of spiders if they had eight tiny flip flops on.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

Airlines when they need to change your flight: here’s a complimentary napkin. Airlines when you need to change your flight: that’ll be $8700.

Going viral on Telegram:

Why would I want a memory pillow? Sleep is where I go to forget.

Seen just now on Facebook:

Hiccups became less popular. I never hear people hiccuping anymore. What’s going on there?

Breaking via Threads:

Every Microsoft Teams invite you get lowers your testosterone by 1-2%

Live now on LinkedIn:

Forced to say “it’s okay” instead of throwing a chair at them.

Trending via X:

“New recipe” is code for “less content, but worse ingredients”.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

A thousand curses upon anyone who has ever gone, “Why are you sitting in the dark?” and then flipped the light on without asking.

Just shared via WeChat:

I am not in a good place, geographically.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Everyone hates on the dentist but at least they don’t try to weigh you.

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