BOSTON—In a surprising new trend, men are experiencing the joy of receiving flowers while still alive. “I had no idea I could actually enjoy petals before my funeral,” said John Harkins, 34, upon getting chrysanthemums for his birthday. “Turns out roses aren’t just harbingers of death,” he added with newfound appreciation.
Florists nationwide report an increase in bouquet sales to men. “It’s the same look you see when they hit the game-winning home run,” remarked local florist Rita Bloom. Harkins even plans to get his dad peonies for Father’s Day, saying, “It’s nice not to have to wait until he kicks the bucket to buy him hydrangeas.”
Despite the new personal flower revolution, not all remains sunny. “Looks like they hurled a rainbow at my coffin,” complained Jim Walters, who pre-ordered a funeral bouquet for his living room. “If this is the future, I’d rather take my chances with a loaf of bread or something.”