Yes, I’m full of microplastics, but it’s actually been helpful. It’s given me superpowers. I can communicate with Tupperware.

Yes, I’m full of microplastics, but it’s actually been helpful. It’s given me superpowers. I can communicate with Tupperware.

Trendy Funny Quotes

  • Fishing for compliments like “I’m a mess in this photo that I took all morning to get the right angle and filter and after 50 selfies this is me”.
  • My four moods: I’m too old for doing that. I’m too tired for doing that. I’m too sober for doing that. I don’t have time for doing that.
  • Why do plane tickets have to be so expensive? You’re literally going that way anyway. Just give me a ride.
  • Them: Money doesn’t bring happiness. Me: Pass the money over here, I like to be sad.
  • “What’s something you’d tell your younger self?” You can have ice cream for dinner, nobody will stop you.
  • I’ve got nothing against kids, I just don’t understand why you’d want indoor kids.