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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇾 has copied:

How is rent for 28 days the same amount as for 31 days? Where is my change?

Someone from 🇨🇬 has copied:

My career goal is to be able to just delete my LinkedIn account at some point.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has bookmarked:

From now on, every time I think I’m hating too much, I will think of Kendrick and realize I’m not hating to my full potential.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has shared:

This pillow isn’t going to scream into itself.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has shared:

I love when people start getting filler, and instead of looking younger, it’s just like okay, your face is getting really, really big in all directions.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has viewed:

Y’all can keep the nonchalant ones — I want mine weak in the knees about me.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has viewed:

I don’t have any rizz but I do have snacks in my purse.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has copied:

Everyone says “Do what makes you happy”, until you push them down the stairs.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

Please no requests for a threesome. If I want to disappoint two people at the same time, I’ll visit my parents.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has downloaded:

Nobody should be blowing up Teslas. If you just wait a bit, they’ll probably do it by themselves.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

3,961

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Reddit:

I am like a wildflower, a quiet rebellion blooming through ruins and dust.

Making waves on X:

A friend’s boyfriend is not my friend… that is a coworker, at best.

Seen just now on Twitch:

When someone yells stop, I don’t know if it’s in the name of love, it’s hammer time, or if I should collaborate and listen.

Shared recently on Twitch:

I’ll let you guys know if the psych ward has wifi.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Hey! Remember in the first grade when we were all just chilling and then some kid would throw up out of nowhere?

Broadcasted on Slack:

I heard God is testing both of us at the same time. Wanna hang out?

Broadcasted on Messenger:

I toss and turn in bed all night like a beautiful rotisserie chicken.

Going viral on WeChat:

The T in depression stands for the therapy places that are immediately available.

Trending via WeChat:

Laying in a hammock is essentially saying, “I hope there are no emergencies.”

Seen just now on Facebook:

I wouldn’t trust a single one of you with a flying car.

Home » Funny Bad Quotes

240 Funny bad quotes

Funny bad quotes turn life’s little disasters and not-so-great moments into comedy gold! 😂💥 Whether it’s a bad hair day, a terrible decision made with full confidence, or just waking up on the wrong side of everything, these quotes remind us that sometimes the “bad” stuff makes for the best laughs. Because if it’s going wrong, you might as well laugh about it! 😆🚫🤷‍♀️

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All funny bad quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

63 shares on Instagram this month:

I think you’re like the cat’s meow, annoying yet sweet.

32 shares on YouTube this month:

Dentist appointments are so weird. “Hi, nice to meet you, could you root around in my mouth for a bit?”

67 shares on YouTube this month:

Doctor advised me to stop drinking. This is going to be a big change for me. I was with that doctor for decades.

28 shares on Slack this month:

His palm trees are Serengeti, destination wedding, luggage is heavy. There’s vomit on his tux already, Dollar store confetti.

36 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’m not well rested. Sleeping Beauty was well rested.

89 shares on TikTok this month:

Yeah, no worries, man. You just showed everyone that you have a lot of resentments bubbling underneath, but otherwise, it was a cool evening.

95 shares on Facebook this month:

“I asked ChatGPT”. I confided in Amazon. I confessed to McDonald’s. I have an inside joke with Exxon Mobil.

65 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Nasa is launching a satellite to say sorry to the aliens. They’re calling it the Apollo G.

12 shares on Slack this month:

My favorite military tradition is asking someone what an acronym means right after they use it, and they don’t know what it means.

32 shares on X this month:

Could you even imagine the crime rate if no one drank coffee or ate bacon.

Trending Topics 📁

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Hot Jokes 💥

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve been locked out of Tinder because of “unusual activity”. I must’ve got a match.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

After you do your laundry, you should be allowed to get in the dryer and tumble for a little. No charge.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I do believe TikTok saves the funniest videos for late at night. There’s no way.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Any time I throw up, I stare at it like I’m getting a message from the past.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Okay, this is getting ridiculous. It can’t just be the one guy. It’s gotta be a group of people pooping my son’s diaper.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

My biggest sexual fantasy is someone throwing a million dollars on my naked body and then leaving me alone.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Take me back to the night we met so I can never give you a chance.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

That period between finding out you got a new job and actually starting the new job is one of the best times in life.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Bag of salad is the boxed wine of vegetables.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I miss when bills had nothing to do with me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

4,080

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

I do believe TikTok saves the funniest videos for late at night. There’s no way.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

The biggest joke on mankind is that computers have started asking humans to prove that they are not robots.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

Not to brag, but I’ve seen Barbie naked.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

This meeting should’ve been a fist fight.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

The only thing I gained so far this year is weight.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has bookmarked:

Airlines be like: “Oh, wow. Oh, God. We didn’t think everyone would bring a bag!”

Someone from 🇲🇻 has copied:

Some of you aren’t reading the room. Not even listening to the room on audiobook.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has copied:

Me: God, please stop giving me your toughest battles. God: You just have to empty the dishwasher.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

I love how you get on Twitter, and all your thoughts are already in someone else’s tweet.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has copied:

Three words no parent ever wants to hear when dropping their kid at a play date: “Come on in.”

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Pinterest:

Apparently you’re not supposed to announce that there’s been a death in the family every time you kill a houseplant.

Going bananas on Facebook:

“You’re always drinking wine!” God forbid a girl enjoys the first miracle of Jesus.

Seen just now on Slack:

Female friendship is all about taking turns being insane. First, one of you is crazy, and the other has to counterbalance by being normal. Then, thirty minutes later, you get to trade.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Sorry I was late, I was waiting for my CVS receipt to finish printing.

Spotted on WeChat:

Once you book a trip, it becomes hard to focus on life.

Going viral on Instagram:

You ever meet an all-male friend group that is less a group of friends than it is “one guy and his henchmen”?

Going bananas on Telegram:

When you have the money, you can go a whole day without eating. But when you’re broke, the dizziness starts at 6 a.m.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

I can’t stand when people need constant validation online. Like, comment, and share if you agree.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Dear women, when you’re not around we load the dishwasher properly.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Aliens: We are here to take over. Me: Thank God.

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