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259 Funny being quotes

Trending Funny Being Quotes 🔥

People should be able to call in healthy: “Look, I’m not coming into the office today. I feel really good and I don’t want to waste it on being at work.“
What must a pancake think when it’s being flipped? Doubtless something jolly.
Did you ever stop to ask how Mercury feels about being in retrograde? No, because you only think about yourself.
I think being a hopeless romantic is giving me brain damage.
Being a dinosaur sounds kinda nice. No bills, no work, just extinct.

More funny being quotes 👇

5 months ago
Share →: I want to be cuddled, but I also want to be left alone. Being crazy is hard.

Commentary:
"Deciding between cuddles and solitude… the eternal struggle of the indecisively crazy. 🤔🤗🚶‍♀️ #CrazyConundrums"
5 months ago
Share →: I am one step away from being rich, all I need now is money.

Commentary:
"Ah, the eternal struggle of being just a step away from riches, but alas, that pesky detail of actually having the money! 💸💰 Hang in there, friend, you're almost there…almost. 😄"
5 months ago
Share →: My teen being nice to me is getting really expensive.

Commentary:
"My teen being nice to me is like finding a rare gem 💎 in a minefield of eye rolls and attitude 💁‍♀️💸. I guess kindness isn't always free, especially in the teenage world! 🤑 #TeenagerDilemmas"
5 months ago
Share →: If I had known I looked this sexy in glasses, I would’ve stopped being able to see a long time ago.

Commentary:
"Who needs vision when you have such a fabulous look? 😎 Say goodbye to 20/20 and hello to 100/100 in style! 👓 #BlindButFabulous"
5 months ago
Share →: I will never stop being a quitter!

Commentary:
"Ah, the art of stubbornly surrendering. A true quitter's dilemma! 🤣 Let's embrace our ability to quit things…like quitting quitting! 😉"
5 months ago
Share →: Does anyone know if there’s a career in being a piece of shit?

Commentary:
"Ah, the age-old question of the century! 🤣 Well, if being a piece of shit was a profession, let's just say the job market would be overflowing with candidates! 💩 But hey, at least they could offer a 'crappy' benefits package! 😉"
5 months ago
Share →: Imagine being all knowing and still putting a snake in charge of apples.

Commentary:
"Who needs enemies when you've got a snake managing the fruit supply 🍏🐍 Talk about the ultimate 'bad apple' situation! 🤣 #SneakySnakeManagement"
5 months ago
Share →: One of the benefits of being my friend is that you can come to my house in your pajamas, no make-up, and look like crap and I won’t judge you.

Commentary:
"Who needs a personal stylist when you have a friend like this? The ultimate fashion statement: Pajamas-chic! 💁‍♀️💤 #NoJudgmentZone"
5 months ago
Share →: I have a condition that prevents me from dieting. It’s called being hungry.

Commentary:
"Trying to diet but failing miserably? Blame it on that pesky condition called being HUNGRY 🍔🍟🍦. No shame in prioritizing your stomach's needs over salad, right? 😉"
5 months ago
Share →: Nothing more humbling than being at a karaoke birthday party with a bunch of singers.

Commentary:
"Ah yes, the ultimate test of vocal prowess and humility – karaoke with a group of singers 🎤🎂 It's like the Olympics of 'Please Don't Stop Believin'' 😉 #KaraokeProblems"