Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇲 has downloaded:

Tinder is a food delivery app if you’re good at it.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has downloaded:

My career plan? Win the lottery and disappear.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has bookmarked:

Hold music is annoyingly scratchy and repetitive on purpose, so you will hang up and stop bothering them.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has downloaded:

Vaginally speaking, he seems nice.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

I used to have this mental illness, where I thought logical arguments would change someone’s mind.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has viewed:

80% of arguments start because someone hasn’t eaten yet.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has viewed:

For introverts, the worst kind of head-on collision is running directly into the person we’re avoiding at the grocery store.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has viewed:

Christmas combines two things I love the most, getting fat and lying to children.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has viewed:

It’s weird how the UFO’s always seem to crash in places that only the government and military have access to.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has copied:

I think I’ma end the year with a plot twist, everyone hold on tight.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,549

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

That moment when you’re reading but realize you forgot to understand.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

That awkward moment when you try something on in a shop but you don’t know if you can get it off again.

Trending via WeChat:

Oh right, like you’ve never let your kids stay lost in a corn maze just a little longer.

Spotted on Instagram:

Stop bothering me, or I will inform you of a behavioral pattern that is noticeable to other people, but I can tell you are not yet aware of.

Going viral on Messenger:

Nutrition labels should include an “What if I ate the whole thing” section.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Did you know if you hold your ear up to a stranger’s leg, you can actually hear them say, ‘What the hell are you doing?’

Spotted on Twitch:

Shazam, but for the name of the person who literally just introduced themself to me.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

I’m done with dating sites and am now only focusing on food delivery people. They have a job, a car, and most importantly food.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

My dad must pay my monthly cell phone bill as atonement for his original sin of creating my consciousness.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

Corporate life requires an ass-licking skill set I simply wasn’t born with.

Funny dignity quotes

Funny dignity quotes bring a fresh twist to staying graceful 😂✨ They remind us that keeping our pride intact doesn’t mean taking life too seriously 🙃 Whether you’ve tripped in public or faced awkward moments, these witty lines add a sprinkle of humor to dignity and self-respect 💁‍♂️💬 Ready to laugh while embracing your inner poise? Let’s dive in! 🎉

New funny dignity quotes 👇

All funny dignity quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

17 shares on LinkedIn this month:

God saw you do that.

72 shares on YouTube this month:

And then I thought to myself, “What’s the point of cleaning if my family is going to keep living here?”

30 shares on X this month:

Being gracefully insane is the secret to staying somewhat sane in an insane world.

46 shares on Slack this month:

The minute I start feeling like a mother to a man, the relationship is over.

14 shares on TikTok this month:

If we hadn’t made them extinct, instead of Kung Fu Panda we could have had Tae Kwon Dodo.

95 shares on X this month:

Today I ate vegetable lasagna… I don’t want to talk about it.

62 shares on WhatsApp this month:

The only reason to engage with a neighbor is if either of you is on fire.

24 shares on Twitch this month:

How much chocolate is too much chocolate before it is technically no longer a salad?

79 shares on TikTok this month:

I’m at the “buy bigger jeans” part of my Eat. Pray. Love. journey.

39 shares on X this month:

Pinterest algorithm is like a loving dad who fills the whole fridge with oranges after seeing you enjoy one.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

15 folks are currently checking 👀

If I was God, I would’ve equipped women with venom glands.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

You haven’t experienced proper anger until you have a sister.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

As a girl, I should be allowed to speak to the moon directly.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s that time of year again where I go to random restaurants to tell random women, “So this is why you cancelled our date?”, while they’re out with their significant others.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Dancing alone in your home is its own kind of therapy.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

When I die, I want to come back as a speed bump so I can piss people off.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I slept like a baby, knowing I’m a burden to everyone around me.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

What are some beginner pieces of information for somebody just getting into knowledge?

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m at the age where using the wrong pillow makes you feel like you broke your neck.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Are you just gonna go with the flow until you spiral down the drain?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,644

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇸 has bookmarked:

My hobbies include adding things to my cart, and never buying them.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

Today is the Mondayest Thursday that has ever been mistaken for a Friday in the history of Wednesdays.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

Might quit my job to focus on actually putting away my laundry.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

If I was on Love Island, I wouldn’t be fighting anyone or starting drama. I would just be playing mermaids in the pool the whole time. They’ve got that giant, beautiful pool, and nobody’s using it.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has viewed:

I love canceling plans. I didn’t want to go in the first place. I just wanted to be invited.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has bookmarked:

Where do I sign up to be one of those influencers with 2M followers whose whole thing is just standing in front of other people’s content and nodding?

Someone from 🇺🇿 has downloaded:

“You’re acting weird!” I’m not acting.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

Gentle parenting is making sure your kids can’t hear what you say when you’re peeling a mango.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

Shopping at the dollar store makes me feel rich and poor all at the same time.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

I was the most patient parent and then I had kids.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on YouTube:

Thanks to rice cakes, I still can’t imagine nothingness, but now I know what it tastes like.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Another day of waking up cute instead of wealthy, so I guess I have to go to work.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

It’s curious how kids are always really hungry right before dinner and right after dinner, but never during actual dinner.

Shared recently on X:

I’ve never wished a man dead, but I’ve read some obituaries with great pleasure.

Shared recently on X:

Instead of being constantly irritated by other people’s flaws, I’ve decided to become more self-absorbed.

Just landed via Twitch:

I’m soirée for my mispronunciation of French words.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

Cats are the best authoritarians. You will do their bidding, and you will like it.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

All these microplastics in me could at least do some repair work to my knees and back while they’re in there.

Just landed via Threads:

Dear resealable chocolate bag, your confidence in my self-control was truly inspiring. And you were delicious.

Shared recently on Threads:

My talents are so hidden that I can’t even find them.

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