28 Funny due quotes

• There are beautiful horny women (me) being forced into celibacy due to the utter lack of worthy men in existence. This is the world we are living in now.

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  3 weeks ago

  beautiful, being, celibacy, dating, due, existence, forced, frustration, horny, humor, lack, life, living, man, me, men, modern, modern life, woman, women, world, worthy, worthy man

• I just be minding my business, and next thing you know, a payment is due.

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  1 month ago

  adulting, bills, business, date, due, due date, i, just, know, minding, next, payment, procrastination, responsibility, surprise, thing

• My favorite game is to guess if my headache is due to dehydration, migraine, malnutrition, stress, lack of sleep, poor position, or a brain tumor.

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  2 months ago

  brain, brain tumor, dehydration, due, favorite, game, guess, headache, health, health humor, humor, joke, lack, lack of sleep, malnutrition, medical, medical joke, migraine, poor, poor position, position, sleep, stress, tumor

• If I say “with all due respect,” nothing respectful is about to come out of my mouth.

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  2 months ago

  communication, due, humor, i, irony, mouth, nothing, phrase, respect, sarcasm, say, speech

• Matcha. Dubai chocolate. Jealousy. Green is back in a big way, and likely due to deforestation.

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  2 months ago

  back, big, chocolate, deforestation, Dubai, Dubai chocolate, due, environmental, environmental humor, green, humor, irony, jealousy, matcha

• Due to unforeseen circumstances, I will be acting weird today.

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  2 months ago

  acting, acting weird, circumstances, day, due, humor, humorist, i, quirky, today, unexpected, unforeseen, unforeseen circumstances, weird

• Due to inflation, alien abduction no longer comes with free probes. Humans are required to bring their own probes or may purchase a probe on board the spacecraft for a moderate fee.

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  2 months ago

  abduction, alien, alien abduction, board, bring, due, extraterrestrial, fee, free, humans, humor, inflation, joke, longer, own, probes, purchase, required, sci-fi, sci-fi joke, space, space humor

• My favorite game is guessing if my headache is due to dehydration, migraine, malnutrition, stress, lack of sleep, poor posture, or a brain tumor.

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  2 months ago

  brain, concern, dehydration, due, favorite, game, guessing, headache, health, health concern, humor, lack, malnutrition, medical, medical humor, migraine, poor, posture, sleep, stress

• If I ever say “with all due respect”, please understand that there is none.

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  2 months ago

  disrespect, due, ever, humor, i, irony, none, please, respect, sarcasm, say, understand, witty

• Due to inflation and tariffs, my love now costs a thing.

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  2 months ago

  cost, costs, due, economics, humor, inflation, love, relationship, tariffs, thing

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