Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇴 has copied:

Starting your most incoherent sentence with “put simply” to deflect blame onto the reader.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has shared:

It doesn’t matter how old you get, buying snacks for a road trip should always look like an unsupervised 9-year-old was given $100.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

Twitter account so good even HR wants to see it.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has bookmarked:

My favourite thing about waking up at ridiculous o’clock is the solitude.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

You want me to attend a work meeting? The thing that killed Julius Caesar?

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

Don’t ruin a good sundress by wearing panties.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has bookmarked:

Don’t judge me on my likes, I’m confusing the algorithm.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has bookmarked:

When someone yells stop I don’t know whether it’s in the name of love, it’s Hammer time, or I should smell the flowers.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has shared:

Becoming a psychic for the foreseeable future.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has copied:

I’m looking for insults so intelligent you don’t realize you’ve been roasted until three thoughts later.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,262

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on WeChat:

If you’re not happy single you won’t be happy married. Happiness comes from eating food, not from relationships.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

“Well, at least tomorrow is Friday.” -Me, having a bad Wednesday that’s about to get even worse.

Breaking via Threads:

Easy there, unsaved number.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Babe, are you OK? You’ve barely touched your unread books.

Seen just now on Messenger:

“This is a great weekend to clean out the garage,” according to my wife and other people who won’t be cleaning the garage.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Drilling for oil is well boring.

Just landed via Facebook:

If you’re not easily offended, why are you even online?

Making waves on WhatsApp:

There’s a disconnect between the decibel level of my car singing and my talent.

Just landed via Threads:

I was born to be wild, but only until around 9pm or so.

Seen just now on Instagram:

So blunt, you can smoke my truth.

Funny homeless quotes

Funny homeless quotes bring a lighthearted twist to a serious topic, blending humor with empathy 🤡🏠. They remind us that laughter can come from unexpected places, sparking smiles while raising awareness 🌟💬. Whether quirky, witty, or downright silly, these quotes offer a unique perspective that’s both playful and thought-provoking 🤔😂. Ready to brighten your day with some clever lines? Let’s dive in and enjoy the lighter side of life’s challenges! 🌈✨

New funny homeless quotes 👇

All funny homeless quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

43 shares on X this month:

We need a better word for horny that sounds elegant and gorgeous.

76 shares on TikTok this month:

You don’t scare me. You’re not the evil eye I get from my dog when I make him get up from the couch so I can lay down.

58 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Kind of rude you didn’t wake me up before you went went.

60 shares on LinkedIn this month:

How does pasta water know when you’re not looking?

36 shares on X this month:

My kid’s superpower is knowing he won’t like a food before he even tries it.

12 shares on Twitch this month:

Getting a wife is very powerful, because you get a personal psychic that will tell you things like, “Your keys are in the gray pants in the hamper,” and “He will ultimately betray you.”

62 shares on Twitch this month:

About to watch Tenet for the first time and I enjoyed it.

55 shares on Discord this month:

Unlike smoking, vaping doesn’t reduce your sex drive. It just reduces the sex drive of the people who see you vaping.

55 shares on WeChat this month:

My new pajamas have no pockets. I don’t want to hear your problems.

63 shares on Reddit this month:

The worst part about getting sucked up by the tornado you’re filming is to die knowing your wife was right. You are an idiot.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

20 folks are currently checking 👀

1pm, the perfect time to start doing the work I woke up early to get a jump on.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate when the lotion bottle pump squirts the hardened remains of its mucus plug into the palm of your hand.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Best friends: they know how crazy you are but still choose to be seen in public with you.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

If we get invaded by space aliens, I am immediately defecting to the alien side. Sorry.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Gyms are empty because they’re all on weight loss drugs.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

If you watch Home Alone backwards it’s a loving story about a kid that heals two men that were savagely beaten.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Losing weight is basically all about being cold 90% of the time.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I sign all anniversary cards with ‘Way to commit to the bit!’

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Carrying a conversation counts as cardio.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

The police sent me a photo radar ticket so I sent them a photo of a hundred dollars, so I guess we’re even.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,624

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇨 has downloaded:

I would only enjoy the Met Gala if at the end of that runway they all walked into a volcano.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has viewed:

Girl, if the moon can block the sun, then you can definitely block your ex.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has shared:

Why would I finish my thought when I could have a new, more exciting one?

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

At first I’m shy, then I’m a podcast.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has viewed:

I would love to be the reason you look at your phone and smile. Then walk into a wall.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has downloaded:

They hooked up tubes and sensors, but the doctor still can’t figure out why my kisses are so sweet. They want to hold me overnight and “never let go.”

Someone from 🇬🇩 has bookmarked:

Quickie so fast, it’s called secs.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has downloaded:

We can do things two ways. My way or the right way.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has copied:

I’m not here to offend anyone; I’m here to offend everyone.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has viewed:

My watch battery is fully charged. So I got some time.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Instagram:

When you get angry, take a breath and count to ten. Throw a punch at eight. Nobody expects that.

Spotted on Telegram:

Sure sex is cool, but have you ever farted away a stomachache?

Seen just now on Twitch:

Oasis didn’t just write good songs. They wrote the soundtrack for a whole generation.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

At this point making life choices involves liquor and a dart board.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

There comes a time in everyone’s life when you hear the newest slang, and you decide that you don’t care enough to know what it means.

Live now on Reddit:

Women in movies look so beautiful when they sleep. Meanwhile, I’m tossing and turning all night like a forgotten 7-Eleven hot dog.

Trending via Pinterest:

So a baby crawls across the floor to it’s bottle and it’s cute but when I do it Im in need of an intervention?

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

Adding “scroll for two hours” to my To-Do list, so I won’t do it.

Making waves on Messenger:

My kid is turning out just like me. Well played, karma. Well-played.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Sorry about all of the correct stuff I said when I was right.

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