Funny quotes » missing

22 Funny missing quotes

New funny missing quotes 👇

  • Taking a sip of beer and letting out a big “ahhhh” so the pregnant lady at the pool next to me knows what she’s missing.

    Commentary:
    “When life gives you lemons, just make sure they aren’t floating in someone else’s pool drink! 🍺😆🤰 #PoolsidePerks”

  • Convinced my kid her harmonica didn’t work because the instructions were missing.

    Commentary:
    Haha, so the kid thought the harmonica was broken because the instructions went missing? 🎵🧸 Maybe next time, she’ll realize that sometimes, you just blow into it and let your talent do the talking! 😂🎶 #ParentingMysteries #MusicalMysteries

  • “Can you explain the gap in your resume?” I went missing in a national park.

    Commentary:
    “Oh, you see, I was just *exploring new horizons* and got a little too carried away 🌲. Lost in nature’s beauty, I decided to extend my sabbatical for a while 🚶‍♂️. But fear not, I’ve now returned to civilization with an even greater love for the great outdoors! 🏞️ #LostAndFound”

  • If I ever go missing, promise me that you won’t put my weight on the poster.

    Commentary:
    “Sure, just describe me as ‘Last seen at the fridge’ instead 🍔🍟😄 #MissingNotLost”

  • I think something’s missing in my life… Like… 2-3 million dollars.

    Commentary:
    “Well, if 2-3 million dollars is what’s missing in your life, I’d say you’re just a few zeros away from being truly fulfilled. Who needs inner peace and self-discovery when you can have a yacht and endless shopping sprees, right?”

  • I’m convinced the washing machine is a portal to another dimension for socks.

    Commentary:
    Oh, absolutely! 🧦🌀🚪 Socks mysteriously disappearing in the laundry can only mean one thing… They must be embarking on secret adventures through the elusive washing machine portal! Next time you do laundry, keep an eye out for any interdimensional travelers trying to hitch a ride on your clothes! 🕵️‍♂️✨

  • Good morning to everyone except the people who are missing the ability to read the room.

    Commentary:
    “Good morning to everyone except the ones still searching for their Roommate of the Year award 🤷‍♂️📚 Hope they stumble upon some good vibes today! 😂”

  • Hey boy, are you the sun? Because you were a big part of my life this summer but now I feel like I never see you.

    Commentary:
    “Hey boy, are you the sun? ☀️ Because just like the sun in summer, you were shining bright in my life ☀️🔥 But now, it feels like you’ve decided to take a vacation to the other side of the world without warning! 🌍😂 #MIA #SunOrBoy”

  • I’m so good at missing early morning meetings, I can do it with my eyes closed.

    Commentary:
    “Missing early morning meetings is an art form 🎨 Who needs alarms when you have natural talent like this? Maybe next time, try setting your alarm to snooze and repeat 5 times, just to keep things interesting 😉⏰ #ProfessionalSleeper”

  • If you don’t like sports, you are missing a whole world of easy-going conversations with complete strangers.

    Commentary:
    “Oh, you don’t like sports? You’re missing out on all the opportunities to bond with strangers over the pain of your favorite team losing! 🤣🏈 Don’t worry, we can still chat about the weather or complain about Mondays instead! ☀️😩”

For even more funny missing quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny missing quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Advertisement

Trending Topics

activity communication day family food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me need parenting people procrastination relationship sarcasm sleep social someone technology think time want work