Funny officer quotes

• The reason my eyes are dilated is because I am so attracted to you, officer.

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  4 weeks ago

  am, attraction, crush, eyes, flirting, humor, humor quote, i, joke, officer, playful, police, reason, romance, witty

• My account is fake, I’m actually your probation officer.

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  1 month ago

  account, actually, fake, humor, identity, joke, officer, probation, probation officer, relationship, surprise

• Police officer: please step out of your vehicle. Me: after this song, hold on.

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  1 month ago

  after, distraction, hold, humor, me, officer, police, response, situation, song, step, vehicle

• Maybe your dog is barking at my luggage because he doesn’t enjoy his job, officer.

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  1 month ago

  barking, conversation, dog, enjoy, humor, job, luggage, maybe, misunderstanding, officer

• Helpful police officer reminded me he’s the one asking the questions.

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  1 month ago

  asking, authority, funny moment, helpful, humor, interaction, me, moment, officer, police, police officer, questions, reminder

• I was blinded by a goddamn deer with a shiny red nose… No, officer, I haven’t been drinking.

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  1 month ago

  deer, drinking, funny incident, humor, i, incident, nose, officer, red, shiny, shiny nose, situation, unexpected, unexpected situation, wildlife

• Yes officer, I’d like to file a restraining order against my dentist’s appointment reminder system.

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  1 month ago

  appointment, dentist, humor, ID, officer, order, reminder, restraining, restraining order, sarcasm, system, yes

• Yes, officer I saw the speed limit, I just didn’t see your car.

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  1 month ago

  car, driving, excuse, humor, i, joke, just, limit, officer, speed, speed limit, traffic, yes

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