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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

I’m like a candle: I’m cute, I smell nice, and there’s a pretty good chance I’ll set your curtains on fire if left unattended.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has copied:

Naturally introverted, selectively extroverted.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has downloaded:

My kids had to work extra hard this morning but they were able to get the clean house back to it’s normal messy state just in time for the guests to arrive.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

You know who else works in mysterious ways? Me.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has bookmarked:

Short men store so much anger in their little body.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has shared:

I only sleep so my phone can get the night off.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has downloaded:

So annoying when your family knocks on the toilet door and asks what you’re doing. I’m baking a cake. HBU?

Someone from 🇹🇱 has downloaded:

That awkward moment when you leave a store without buying anything, and all you can think is: “Act normal, you are innocent.”

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

If you pretend you’re erasing the evidence of a murder while cleaning the bathroom, you’ll do a better job, and it actually becomes fun!

Someone from 🇸🇦 has shared:

I’m delusional but self-aware, I call that Delaware.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

3,762

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on WhatsApp:

It’s almost time to pack away the black summer clothes and unpack the black winter clothes.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

Twitter can teach you a lot of lessons. Grammar is not one of them.

Breaking via Snapchat:

If there’s one thing I’m good at, it’s being annoyed by stupidity.

Going bananas on TikTok:

If I was a fish, I’d be smoking all the seaweed.

Broadcasted on Threads:

I remember sex. That was cool.

Just shared via Discord:

I’m a work in progress that hasn’t made much progress.

Spotted on Threads:

Can’t believe penguins have to publish all those books with their tiny hands.

Going viral on Instagram:

Someone needs to press pause on this weekend.

Trending via Instagram:

Cancelling a date so I can order pizza and go to bed at 8:30 p.m.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Asbestos? I’m doing asbestos I can.

Home » Funny Paragraphs Quotes

Funny paragraphs quotes

Funny paragraphs quotes are the perfect way to sprinkle laughter into your day 😂✨ Whether you need a quick mood boost or a clever line to share with friends, these witty gems will have you chuckling in no time 🤣💬 Get ready to brighten your feed and spread the joy with humor that’s as sharp as it is silly 🎉📱 Let the good vibes and giggles roll!

New funny paragraphs quotes 👇

All funny paragraphs quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

29 shares on WeChat this month:

Requesting the Pink Panther theme song at karaoke and just standing on the stage motionless the entire time.

70 shares on Messenger this month:

I need someone to wring out my brain like a dishrag.

76 shares on Snapchat this month:

Women call me ugly until they find out how much money I make. Then they call me ugly and poor.

37 shares on TikTok this month:

I will never understand people’s fascination with their ancestry, isn’t knowing your current family bad enough.

90 shares on WeChat this month:

If you bring an acoustic guitar to a bonfire, I’m going to assume it’s for fuel.

75 shares on WeChat this month:

Airports should have tattoo parlors for those of us with long layovers and poor impulse control.

63 shares on Facebook this month:

Remember, you don’t have to worry about being around annoying people in public if you never leave the house.

50 shares on Twitch this month:

You sound smart. You some kinda ‘ologist?

71 shares on Instagram this month:

I think, therefore I am. I am, therefore I think. Therefore I am. I think.

59 shares on Threads this month:

I keep myself humble by messing up all the time.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Befuddlingly, a palm tree won’t fit in your hand.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

You either die a people pleaser, or live long enough to start leaving texts on read.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I thought my friends in their 60s were making love in the other room but they were just putting on their socks.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I always have a bad connection in my head when someone tries to explain a card or board game to me.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

My husband doesn’t find it nearly as amusing as I do when I sing, “Someday My Prince Will Come,” while I’m cleaning.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

If you have an old house, but you haven’t got a ghost, you should complain to the estate agent.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Having a sore throat as a giraffe must really suck.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Why have abs when you can have kebabs?

24 folks are currently checking 👀

My outfit is from Gucci and the body from Ferrero.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Welcome to your 40s. Your bra wins the Oscar for the best actor in a supportive role.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

3,753

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇾 has viewed:

Here’s a fun activity you can do with your kids on rainy days when they have too much energy: Go shopping and leave them at home with their dad.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has shared:

I really understand why boomers text with ellipses between everything… it feels so good…

Someone from 🇲🇩 has downloaded:

Lounging under the stars is top-tier therapy.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has shared:

I see people my age out there climbing mountains and skydiving, and here I am feeling good about myself because I got my leg through my underwear without losing my balance.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has copied:

If the earth was flat, cats would have pushed everything off it by now.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has copied:

My rapper name would be 2 stressd.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has copied:

What if AirPods had tongues and they started licking the inside of your ears to indicate they’re low on battery?

Someone from 🇱🇨 has bookmarked:

Ever since I was a kid, I always knew I wanted to live in a galaxy far, far away.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has shared:

Save tons of money on a weighted blanket by sleeping under the mattress.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has bookmarked:

They say white people don’t have their own culture, but I just got invited to a gender reveal party for a dog, and there’s no way we appropriated that from anyone else.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Pinterest:

The people who upload old movies to the internet are holding society together.

Going bananas on Threads:

The date abruptly ended over a disagreement on how to pronounce Gnocchi.

Just landed via X:

The point of life is going to a good restaurant and getting two cocktails with dinner. That’s it.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Welcome to downtown where the crosswalk signals are merely suggestions and you hope the puddles are water.

Seen just now on Messenger:

I thought being an adult meant cake for breakfast, not budgeting for therapy.

Trending via Snapchat:

I sometimes have the desire to meet certain people again for the first time. Only to simply walk past them.

Live now on WeChat:

The neighbor girl told my kids she wouldn’t come over until they cleaned their rooms, so I guess I do have a favorite child.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Every time I talk, it sounds like it’s my first time trying to speak.

Trending via Messenger:

I need a day off from myself.

Spotted on Telegram:

I would like to be reincarnated as less tired.

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