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Funny Quotes Info 👈

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New funny quotes: 39 this month

15,792 funny quotes and pics

17,796 funny quotes topics

Updated: Mar 9, 2026

 

 

72 Funny past quotes

Funny past quotes have an uncanny ability to tickle our funny bones and bring a smile to our faces 😂. From the absurd to the downright silly, these gems remind us that humor transcends time and space ⏳. Whether you’re searching for a laugh or just a delightful distraction, dive into a world where wit and wisdom collide, leaving you grinning from ear to ear 🤪. Ready for a chuckle? Let’s rewind! 🔄

Saying “This reminds me of my early work,” as I walk past a Rothko.

Posted onFeb 3, 2026

New York is so awesome. Like, yes, let’s spend $108 for breakfast and walk past homeless people freezing.

Posted onFeb 3, 2026

You’re never too old to shout, “Mooooo,” when you drive past some cows.

Posted onFeb 3, 2026

The amount of sleeping I’ve done over the past few days has been phenomenal. I genuinely love doing absolutely nothing.

Posted onFeb 3, 2026

I simply accept my extreme loneliness as punishment for something I did in a past life, and don’t worry about it.

Posted onFeb 3, 2026

When it gets past my bedtime, I get so scared.

Posted onFeb 2, 2026

Having to confirm your past purchases over the phone with your bank’s fraud department is a truly harrowing moment of self-examination for chronic little treat buyers.

Posted onFeb 2, 2026

Pilots lowkey have an aura when they walk past you in the airport.

Posted onFeb 2, 2026

Ever ghost an entire event to avoid one ghost from your past?

Posted onFeb 2, 2026

The only thing I miss from my past is that flat stomach I had.

Posted onFeb 2, 2026

I miss the old days back in the 70s, when I didn’t exist.

Posted onFeb 2, 2026

I’m gonna be the first zoomer to start dropping the ‘two thousand’ when referring to the past. “Yeah, that was back in ‘17.”

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

Aliens probably lock their doors when they fly past Earth.

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

Rise and grind your teeth gently while ruminating over every past mistake.

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

“Are you dating anyone?” I close my eyes when I walk past mirrors.

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

The only way to forget the mistakes you made in the past is to make even bigger and graver mistakes in the present.

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

Sometimes somebody will share something from way back in my timeline, and I’ll think, “Oh God, what all did they see to get there?”

Posted onFeb 1, 2026Feb 26, 2026

My ex texted me saying, “Hey, I miss you,” so I replied, “Sorry, I have zero bars — the past doesn’t have good reception.”

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

I made a graph showing my past relationships. It has an ex axis and a why axis.

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

Don’t stress about your eyesight failing as you get older. It’s nature’s way of protecting you from shock as you walk past the mirror.

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

It’s okay to get rid of the boxes for the electronic things you’ve had for the past couple of years.

Posted onJan 31, 2026

You know you’re getting old when you can’t walk past a bathroom without thinking, “I may as well go while I’m here.”

Posted onJan 31, 2026

When people say, “Stop living in the past,” my thought in turn is, “But the music was so much better then!”

Posted onJan 31, 2026

Can’t wait to get past this phase of my life. I need to see what all of this was for.

Posted onJan 31, 2026

You ever get surprised by your own recurring issues? Like, come on man, I thought we were past this.

Posted onJan 31, 2026

Some people stay in the past because that’s where they peaked.

Posted onJan 31, 2026

I used to have a great future in my past.

Posted onJan 31, 2026

Just accidentally closed a tab I’ve had been meaning to read for the past two years.

Posted onJan 31, 2026

The closest thing I’ve had to a personal trainer is the ice cream truck that drove past my house.

Posted onJan 30, 2026

Being single past 30 is like playing hide and seek, except no one is looking for you.

Posted onJan 30, 2026

I’m staying up past midnight this New Year’s eve. Not to welcome the new year, but to make sure this one is over.

Posted onJan 30, 2026

I’m so thankful I had a childhood before technology took over.

Posted onJan 30, 2026

I bet aliens lock their door when they go past earth.

Posted onJan 30, 2026

I dunno what I did in a past life but holy crap I’m sorry.

Posted onJan 30, 2026

What doesn’t kill you will text you in 5 months to ask “What are you doing?”

Posted onJan 29, 2026

Any time I throw up, I stare at it like I’m getting a message from the past.

Posted onJan 29, 2026

Just accidentally closed a tab I’ve had been meaning to read for the past 2 years.

Posted onJan 29, 2026

So annoying that in order to meet new people you need to go out and meet new people. Ideally, I would have known you in a past life.

Posted onJan 29, 2026

Sorry to any bands who see me yawn during their show. It’s not you, it’s just past 10pm.

Posted onJan 29, 2026

Having a peanut allergy has to be so wild. Like, imagine you’re at a baseball game and there are people chucking bags of rattlesnakes past your head.

Posted onJan 28, 2026

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