Funny rate quotes

• The phrase “don’t take this the wrong way” has a 0% success rate.

  ---

  15 hours ago

  advice, communication, humor, irony, misunderstanding, phrase, rate, success, success rate, take, wrong

• Warning: This movie contains “Adult Themes” such as interest rates, bad knees, back pain, and excitement about going to bed early.

  ---

  2 days ago

  adult, adult theme, back, back pain, bad, bad knee, bed, early, early bed, excitement, going, interest, interest rate, knee, knees, movie, pain, rate, rates, theme, warning

• Films and television have led me to believe that masquerade balls have a higher mortality rate than most wars.

  ---

  1 week ago

  ball, balls, believe, entertainment, film, humor, led, masquerade, me, mortality, rate, television, war, wars

• How are there low birth rates when everyone here is a big baby?

  ---

  1 week ago

  baby, big, big baby, birth, birth rate, everyone, here, humor, irony, low, observation, population, rate

• Could you even imagine the crime rate if no one drank coffee or ate bacon.

  ---

  2 weeks ago

  bacon, breakfast, caffeine, coffee, crime, crime rate, even, humor, imagination, imagine, lifestyle, rate

• Every time my neighbors start moaning, I pause my music to rate the performance.

  ---

  2 weeks ago

  entertainment, every, humor, i, moan, moaning, music, neighbor, neighbors, pause, performance, rate, rating, sound, start, time

• Getting the ick because he put the windshield wipers on at a higher rate than was needed.

  ---

  2 weeks ago

  awkward, awkward moment, dating, getting, getting the ick, ick, moment, peeve, pet, pet peeve, put, rate, windshield, windshield wiper, wiper

• With my staggering 91% survival rate, you’d be a fool to hire another dog sitter.

  ---

  1 month ago

  another, care, dog, dog sitter, fool, hire, humor, pet, pet care, rate, sitter, survival, survival rate

• “I’m interested in the divorce rate for couples who sleep in queen versus king beds.”

  ---

  1 month ago

  bed, bed size, beds, couple, couples, divorce, divorce rate, interested, king, king bed, marriage, queen, queen bed, rate, relationship, size, sleep

• The divorce rate among my socks is astonishing.

  ---

  2 months ago

  among, clothing, divorce, divorce rate, humor, joke, rate, relationship, sock, socks

All funny rate quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌