Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇦 has downloaded:

I suffer from that syndrome where your neutral expression makes it look like you’re an angry serial killer.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has viewed:

Today’s youth will never experience the pain of spending all their pocket money on a music album. Because of ONE good song!

Someone from 🇨🇩 has shared:

Sunrises are really beautiful, but the timing is rather bad.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has shared:

Public transportation is great, but they should invent a type where it’s only me in the vehicle.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has viewed:

You think you’re raising your kids right, and then one of them decides to be a fan of your football team’s arch rival.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has viewed:

I want the job where I push scared skydivers out of planes.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

No, it’s fine. I watched some cartoons and now I feel a little more at ease with your stupidness.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has downloaded:

I’m neither a lover nor a fighter. I’m a snacker.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has shared:

If a beer is 8 bucks, it’s a show. If a beer is 14 bucks, it’s a concert.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has shared:

Shut up brain, I wasn’t even talking to me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,372

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Adults should get spring break from their jobs.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Roses are red, violets are blue. When I listen to rock music, my neighbors do too.

Shared recently on Discord:

I named my wifi “The Promised LAN” because it always connects, but occasionally leaves you wandering in the desert looking for a better signal.

Going viral on X:

I prefer the Easter Bunny, for starters, he’s not making a list and checking it twice, and more importantly, he’s not watching me when I’m sleeping.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Me, as a vampire: Tell me, mortal, have you had any alcohol in the last 24 hours?

Shared recently on Slack:

Finally, we’re living through precedented times.

Breaking via X:

I stopped writing “Feel free to reach out if you need anything else” at the end of my emails because please don’t do that.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Dear people who talk on speakerphone out in public. Everyone around you hates you.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

“It’s Raining Men” and “Let the Bodies Hit the Floor” are the same song from different points of view.

Seen just now on X:

I hate it when I take a picture of myself and see 20 years of bad eating habits and no exercise.

Funny stay-at-home mom quotes

New funny stay-at-home mom quotes 👇

I aspire to be a stay-at-home mom with no kids.

2 weeks ago

aspiration, humor, i, irony, kids, lifestyle, mom, no kids, parenting, stay-at-home, stay-at-home mom

All funny stay-at-home mom quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

75 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I put my pants on just like everybody else: when the police tell me to.

88 shares on Threads this month:

Wife asked if I could stop singing Wonderwall. I said maybe…

61 shares on Messenger this month:

Bro, are you a black hole, because you suck energy and light?

83 shares on Pinterest this month:

Someday I will make a sandwich that will change my life forever.

70 shares on Threads this month:

The only guarantee in life is, if you run errands looking like shit, you will run into everyone you haven’t seen in months.

15 shares on TikTok this month:

When I try to figure out rows vs. columns, I just row away in my boat of confusion!

79 shares on Telegram this month:

Moms will vacuum the ceiling, alphabetize the spice rack, reorganize your socks, then say, “No one helps me around here!”

34 shares on Instagram this month:

Awkward is the new sexy. At least that’s what I’m telling myself, so I don’t cry in front of strangers.

56 shares on Pinterest this month:

Sometimes your ankle takes a vacation while you’re walking.

86 shares on Snapchat this month:

When people block me, I just assume it’s for my rugged good looks and killer jawline.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇴🇲 has shared:

Unfortunately, the movie you want to watch is unavailable on your 13 streaming services. You can rent it for $2.99 though.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

Tired of being the responsible adult. When can I become the irresponsible adult?

Someone from 🇹🇯 has viewed:

You ever cleaned a room in your house so good that you walked out… just to walk back in to see your work?

Someone from 🇲🇾 has viewed:

I will not hesitate to use dark magic on you.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has viewed:

Welcome to your 50s, where coffee is the new happy hour and mornings are the new hangover.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has bookmarked:

Saving up ketchup packets in the fridge so I can one day open my own restaurant.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

What happened to the art of just liking one person?

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

I’m not joining no alternate Twitter app. If this gets taken down, I’m starting a family.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

I can’t wait to get married so I can bring home unnecessary stuff and get yelled at for it.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has downloaded:

It’s a good thing that our phones only convey sight and sound. No offense, but from most of you I would never want to receive a smelfie!

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Slack:

I made the mistake of clicking on an Instagram ad for a flannel shirt, and now the algorithm thinks I’m a lumberjack.

Shared recently on X:

The ’90s were a time of blissful ignorance where we expected rock stars to sleep with groupies.

Just landed via WeChat:

If I’m too much, go find less. I’m not running a clearance sale.

Making waves on Facebook:

If we keep saving daylight, daylight will never learn to save itself.

Shared recently on Discord:

I’m not starting a presentation with “ladies and gentlemen”, I’m using the gender neutral “to those who heed my warnings”.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

With great power comes the absolute certainty that you’ll turn into a right douche.

Seen just now on X:

Yes, I’ve gained weight. Too many people wanted to have sex with me. It was annoying.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

“You changed!” Yeah, I thought three days in the same outfit was kinda pushing it.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Candy cigarettes really used to be a thing and we really bought them and walked around like we were smokers at the tender age of 6.

Just shared via X:

Hey girl, are you a burger? Because I love you.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny stay-at-home mom quotes

New funny stay-at-home mom quotes 👇

I aspire to be a stay-at-home mom with no kids.

All funny stay-at-home mom quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨