Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇻 has copied:

I want to make fun of Kanye but I’m always losing my shit on the internet too.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has bookmarked:

A big shout-out to all the beekeepers. Our unstung heroes.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has shared:

I don’t understand the desire to rock climb. We have stairs for that now. Problem solved.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has viewed:

My dad’s handwriting makes a pharmacist look like a calligrapher.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

Next to nothing is a weird place.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has copied:

Sometimes you have to sit back and imagine what life could be if it wasn’t a horrifying nightmare.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has bookmarked:

Might start signing off emails with, “But what do I know.”

Someone from 🇷🇴 has downloaded:

If she has Bukowski on her nightstand, she will devour you.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

Hand sanitizer will find a cut you didn’t even know you had.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has shared:

When people tell me “you’re going to regret that in the morning”, I sleep until noon because I am a problem solver.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,501

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via YouTube:

Had calamari for the first time ever, and it wasn’t that bad. Maybe I’ll try marriage next.

Breaking via Slack:

“AI is coming for your jobs!” I would love to see AI be unemployed.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Performative male is kinda just a rebrand of metrosexual, which is just a way to say a straight guy is a little bit faggy.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I’m lacking vitamin c-ash.

Breaking via Discord:

Managers want a week of silence and meditation in order to be even more of a manager afterwards.

Just landed via Slack:

Opinions are like air fryers. Everyone’s got one and they won’t stop banging on about them.

Just shared via Snapchat:

You’ll pay good money to hear a comedian say something offensive, but when I say it for free, I’m the bad guy.

Seen just now on Facebook:

I enjoy driving because it combines my desire to sit with my talent for being angry.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

I don’t understand how people use plastic wrap successfully.

Just landed via WeChat:

Not everyone realizes this, but if you clean the pile of receipts out of a purse and stack them together, it makes a teeny tiny book about why you’re broke.

Funny surprise party quotes

Funny surprise party quotes 🎉 bring the perfect mix of laughter 😂 and excitement 🎈 to any celebration! Whether you’re planning a sneaky bash or just want to add some humor 🤪 to your invites, these witty lines will keep everyone guessing and giggling. Ready to turn your surprise party into an unforgettable, fun-filled moment? Let the good times and great laughs roll! 🎊🎂

New funny surprise party quotes 👇

All funny surprise party quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

47 shares on Snapchat this month:

Some people are living bowel movement to bowel movement.

98 shares on Slack this month:

Late replies don’t bother me. As long as we’re not in love, or you don’t owe me money, take your time.

97 shares on LinkedIn this month:

My wife bought new towels and they’re different colors, so I know the entire color scheme of my house is about to change.

47 shares on Twitch this month:

Saying “Who is it?” when the doctor knocks on the exam room door.

63 shares on X this month:

Body: Okay, sleepy time. Brain: Okay, thinky time.

13 shares on Slack this month:

Tariff this, tariff that. When is somebody gonna tariff my clothes and kiss me?

11 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Coffee ain’t cutting it anymore. I need to eat batteries.

44 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Every app is a dating app if you are creepy enough.

98 shares on Messenger this month:

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking recently, and I’ve decided that I really don’t want to do that any more.

52 shares on Slack this month:

A peaceful transition of power happening between me and this red wine just now.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Oh, I have Christmas spirit. The question is: Do I mix it with coke or do I drink it neat?

18 folks are currently checking 👀

It sucks when you have to stand on an escalator for 30 minutes because of a power cut.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Getting a lawn sign so people know what I think today.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I didn’t know that Rome wasn’t built in a day. I wasn’t on that job.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

In medieval Europe, it was pretty easy to amass vast armies eager to go into battle and have their heads chopped off because no one wanted to be alive in medieval Europe.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

No, thanks—social drama. Puberty sucked enough the first time around.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

How long are you allowed to hide in the bathroom during family visits?

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

My rock bottom keeps refreshing.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

ASAP can also mean as slow as possible.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,593

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

iPhone: I’m gonna update your software tonight while you sleep. Next morning, iPhone: I couldn’t do it, bro. Just didn’t feel right. Vibe was off.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

It was a tough year, but at least I did not buy a Labubu.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

All this suffering on earth because someone ate an apple once.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has copied:

I can’t be the only person who thinks the presidential debate should be performed as a rap battle.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has shared:

I like driving by myself. I just played the same song 36 times.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has bookmarked:

Boss: You’ll never find another job like this. Me: That’d be great.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has viewed:

No more bare minimum, I want the moon and the stars. Maybe even a planet at this point.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has copied:

What’s the point of having sex dreams if you always wake up just when it’s getting down to business?

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

My tombstone will read “Hey there, I’m using WhatsApp!”.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

For someone who is afraid of failure, I’m very unmotivated.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Reddit:

All the smart people at the office are worried about being replaced by A.I., but not me. I’m safe until they invent Artificial Stupidity.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

I grew up with six brothers. That’s how I learned to dance: waiting for the bathroom.

Making waves on Slack:

So annoying when your family knocks on the toilet door and asks what you’re doing. I’m baking a cake. HBU?

Just landed via Facebook:

A friend of mine decided to cut all the toxic people out of his life, or so I was informed.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

If white men can’t jump, how do you explain Super Mario?

Breaking via Snapchat:

“I’m not short. I’m just more down to earth than most people.”

Just landed via Reddit:

Standing like a flamingo at my kitchen counter eating watermelon is such a vibe.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

If there are parallel realities, I really hope they’re not as stupid as this one.

Just landed via WeChat:

I know this ain’t smart, but that never stopped me before.

Making waves on TikTok:

How many filters does it take before it’s technically a painting?

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