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Funny terms quotes

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I don’t want to end this year on bad terms with anybody. Could you please apologize to me?
Just as “magic spells” use special rhymes and archaic terms to signal their power, the convoluted language of legalese acts to convey a sense of authority.
I used to blame all my problems on my parents, but now that I’m a grown up, I have come to terms with the fact that when bad things happen to me, it’s probably just that Mercury’s in retrograde again.
I get ignored so much, my name should be “terms and conditions”.
Lord, grant me the serenity to accept the terms and conditions I do not read.

New funny terms quotes 👇

3 months ago
Share →: I get ignored so much, my name should be “terms and conditions”.

Commentary:
"If being ignored were an Olympic sport, you'd definitely win the gold medal! Maybe we should start calling you 'Terms and Conditions' – at least that way people might actually read your messages!"
4 months ago
Share →: I don’t want to end this year on bad terms with anybody. Could you please apologize to me?

Commentary:
"Sure, I'll get right on that apology… just as soon as I finish apologizing to all the other people I've offended this year! Looks like I'll be busy until at least next year. Sorry about that!"
5 months ago
Share →: Mice after a breakup be like “we are not on squeaking terms”.

Commentary:
Haha, those mice sure know how to handle a breakup in style! 🐭😂 Looks like they're not willing to deal with any more drama in their tiny rodent-sized relationships. Time to move on to greener cheese fields! 🧀🌿 #SqueakyCleanBreakups
5 months ago
Share →: Just as “magic spells” use special rhymes and archaic terms to signal their power, the convoluted language of legalese acts to convey a sense of authority.

Commentary:
Ah, the mystical incantations of legal jargon! 🧙‍♂️✨ It's like lawyers are wizards casting spells with words instead of wands. 🪄 "Hear ye, hear ye, by the power vested in these terms and conditions!" 📜💼 Don't be fooled by the smoke and mirrors of legalese – it's all just wordy wizardry in a three-piece suit! 👔🔮
5 months ago
Share →: The number one rule of Thanksgiving dinner is take your own vehicle so you can leave on your own terms.

Commentary:
"Remember, the Thanksgiving dinner table is not for holding grudges… but your car is! 🚗💨 #DriveOffTheGratitude"
5 months ago
Share →: Lord, grant me the serenity to accept the terms and conditions I do not read.

Commentary:
"Lord, give me the serenity to accept the endless terms and conditions I blindly agree to, for they are as mysterious as my WiFi connection 🙏📄🚫 #TermsAndConditions #AcceptAndMoveOn"
5 months ago
Share →: I used to blame all my problems on my parents, but now that I’m a grown up, I have come to terms with the fact that when bad things happen to me, it’s probably just that Mercury’s in retrograde again.

Commentary:
"Well, blame it on the stars, not the folks who gave you life! 🌟✨ Looks like Mercury retrograde gets more airtime than family drama these days! 👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 #CosmicExcuses"