27 Funny toddler quotes

• 

  4 days ago

  Share →: Age regressing by coughing like a toddler, with my tongue out.

  Commentary:
  Coughing like a toddler is my new anti-aging secret 😂👶💨

• 

  2 weeks ago

  Share →: The opposite of “taking candy from a baby” is “putting sunscreen on a toddler.”

  Commentary:
  "BRB, off to invent the SPF 100 toddler wrangle-proof sunscreen! 😅👶🧴 #MissionImpossible"

• 

  2 weeks ago

  Share →: Hell hath no fury like a toddler who lost the chance to push a button.

  Commentary:
  "Beware the wrath of the pint-sized button enthusiast! 😂👶🔘"

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: Having a toddler is wild. I’m getting breaking news about Peppa Pig.

  Commentary:
  "Breaking news: Toddler parents officially know more about Peppa Pig than current events! Tune in next for the weather report from Paw Patrol! 🐷📰🤣"

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: A narcissist wants the authority of a king while having the accountability of a toddler.

  Commentary:
  Ah, the classic royal tantrum with a crown and zero chores! 👑🍼 A narcissist craving kingly power but dodging responsibility like a kid hiding from vegetables. Guess they want the throne without the throne-room cleanup! 😂⚖️

• 

  4 months ago

  Share →: I would just once like to feel as powerful as a toddler throwing their sippy cup whilst sitting atop their high chair.

  Commentary:
  Ah, the untamed might of a toddler with a sippy cup in hand – a force to be reckoned with! If only we could channel that same level of confidence and determination in our adult lives, imagine the chaos we could cause (or prevent)! Just remember, with great power comes great responsibility – and probably a lot of spilled juice.

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I love when toddlers passionately talk to you about absolutely nothing.

  Commentary:
  Isn't it amazing how toddlers can go on and on about nothing as if it's the most important thing in the world? 😂 It's like they're presenting a thesis on why socks shouldn't have seams or why the sky is actually purple. 🧦☁️ Toddler conversations: making the meaningless meaningful since forever!👶🗣️

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Nobody told me that it takes 1-2 business days to put a snow outfit on a toddler.

  Commentary:
  "Who knew dressing a toddler for the snow was a part-time job with its own delivery schedule? ⏳❄️ Just add it to the list of 'skills required for parenting' along with negotiation tactics and advanced snack hiding techniques! 😂👶 #ToddlerSnowFashionista"

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: A toddler in their “why” phase makes you realize how little you know.

  Commentary:
  "Oh, the endless string of 'whys' from a toddler – a surefire way to test your knowledge and patience! 🤔👶 Embracing the 'why' phase is like staring into the vast abyss of curiosity, with only your wits and Google to guide you! 😂🔍 #EndlessInquiries #ToddlerWisdom"

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: Skinning your knee as an adult is so humiliating. That’s the toddler injury.

  Commentary:
  Oh, the shame of adult knee skinning – welcome to the elite club of toddler injury survivors! 🦵👶 Let's face it, trying to play it cool after a knee scrape can be a real test of one's grown-up facade. Walk it off, fellow adult toddler! 😉

For even more funny toddler quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny toddler quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌