Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇬 has viewed:

Drugs do not ruin your career. Drug tests do.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has viewed:

You never realize how long a minute is until you’re doing cardio.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has shared:

At the end of my appointment, the doctor took her own blood pressure.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has copied:

No revenge, because to know me only as a memory is to suffer.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

If you’re going to be weird, be confident about it.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has bookmarked:

The cashier said, “Have a good day,” but she doesn’t mean it.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

My level of sarcasm’s gotten to a point where I don’t even know if I’m kidding or not.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has downloaded:

Are you stupid, sand? You could just lay here forever on this beautiful beach, but no, you have to try with all you’ve got, to get into my shoes.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has viewed:

Mambo No. 5, but it’s in a minor key, and I’m naming women who didn’t text me back.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has bookmarked:

When I was a kid, no phones or tablets. We just read the cereal box at breakfast.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,348

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

At least men and women can agree on one thing: it feels amazing to take a bra off.

Live now on WeChat:

I love reading a menu. Look at all this stuff I want to eat.

Trending via Discord:

I have feelings for you but you have to guess which ones.

Live now on Instagram:

I avoid clarified butter because I prefer my dairy products to be troubled and confused.

Going bananas on WeChat:

Marriage! Because your shitty day doesn’t have to end at work.

Trending via Pinterest:

If you ever have a crush on someone and want it to end, listen to a podcast they are on.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

Proposing at someone else’s wedding is out. Die at their funeral like a real man.

Seen just now on Slack:

I was going to cause mischief tonight, but I climbed into my bed instead.

Just landed via Instagram:

People who have apartment windows that face the street and put their Christmas trees in them, thank you for your service.

Spotted on Instagram:

Keep your friend’s toast and your enemy’s toaster.

Funny wedding dress quotes

Funny wedding dress quotes 👰‍♀️💬 add a splash of humor to the perfect bridal moment! Whether you’re stressing over the gown or just love a good laugh, these witty sayings will have you smiling from the aisle to the after-party 🎉💃. Get ready to giggle and celebrate love with a twist of fun—because every wedding dress deserves a little sass and sparkle! ✨😂

New funny wedding dress quotes 👇

All funny wedding dress quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

54 shares on Threads this month:

I don’t know much about women, but they love containers that hold smaller containers.

96 shares on TikTok this month:

Most people have 32 teeth. Some have 10. Simple meth.

33 shares on Messenger this month:

Sorry I missed your call. I saw that you were calling and immediately threw my phone into an active volcano.

50 shares on Threads this month:

I’m not saying I’m old. I’m just saying that my dinner time and bedtime are getting dangerously close to each other.

84 shares on YouTube this month:

Don’t be boring. Create the gossip you would like to hear.

63 shares on Reddit this month:

I told the trees what you did. Be wary when you enter the forest next.

66 shares on WeChat this month:

Funny thing about zombie movies – they never seem to go after the cameraman.

42 shares on Threads this month:

The web is the only place where you encourage strangers to follow you. What could possibly go wrong?

92 shares on Instagram this month:

Dating someone from Twitter is like choosing your spouse from a mental hospital.

38 shares on Twitch this month:

Career anxiety hitting at random hours of the day.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I talk to my dog like she’s human and, like most humans, she looks at me like I’m an idiot.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

The egg doesn’t swim to the sperm, girl. Never chase a man.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Netflix will help you finish spelling the name of the movie you’re looking for, and then tell you they don’t have it.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

If you love me, please don’t ask me to go camping with you.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m sorry if I seem weird, it’s because I am.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Just when you’ve built some confidence that you’re a smarter than average human, universe sends you captcha.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes our greatest achievement in life is being able to survive our own thoughts.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

We are both insane on the web, I think we can make it work.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

The sexual tension between my tendency to do something stupid and my resolve not to.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Got an email from my bank saying “is your 401k enough to retire on” and it’s like you are my bank, you know it’s not.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,339

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

Person: gives compliment. Me: let me give you a brief synopsis of why you are sorely mistaken.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has downloaded:

There are people who leave comments on porn videos.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has viewed:

I wish I loved anything as much as my two year old loves pulling my pants down.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has viewed:

Can’t believe I didn’t get invited to that party I would have made up an excuse not to go to.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has viewed:

My life is a constant cycle of waiting for the weekend.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has copied:

Do other people remember toasters with wings flying across our computer screens or was that a fever dream I just had?

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

True luxury is sleeping until you wake up by yourself.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

Quit keeping your enemies closer. No wonder you feel like shit.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has bookmarked:

This post is invisible, and only those going to Hell can see it.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has bookmarked:

Exercise won’t cure your depression, but it can make you hotter than your enemies.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via TikTok:

Where can one find a sugar daddy? Asking for a friend.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking recently, and I’ve decided that I really don’t want to do that any more.

Making waves on Facebook:

If you want to feel really bad about yourself, just start dating.

Making waves on X:

Someone you haven’t talked to in forever will show up in your dream just to do a backflip.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

In terms of wasting time, today was very productive.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Need to clean the fridge, so I’m going to do the responsible thing and drink wine instead.

Trending via Discord:

Some people get weird as they get older. Not me, though. I’ve always been weird.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Nothing is riskier than closing your eyes again in the morning for that extra minute of sleep.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

So glad that the dream I had of you isn’t affecting me at all, and I’m able to go on with my day without thinking of it.

Shared recently on YouTube:

How many exercise videos do you have to buy before you get some results?

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