Trendy Funny Quotes

  • Sometimes the laugh is funnier than the joke itself.
  • I hate having a messy house. Not enough to actually clean it, but enough to give it a disgusted stare while I peacefully relax on the couch.
  • The 5 seconds in the morning, when I don’t yet know who I am, is the best time of the day.
  • If you were the birthday gift I bought my daughter 3 months ago, where would you be hiding?
  • Being skinny may be nice, but chicken nuggets are even nicer.
  • When I get tired of shopping, I sit down and try on shoes.