Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
😂👨‍⚕️ "Next stop: Therapy Land! Watch out, ladies, I know all the best spots… for self-discovery and personal growth! Buckle up for a one-way ride to emotional enlightenment! 🚗💨"

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Coffee tastes so much better handed to me.

0

2 months ago

better, coffee, convenience, enjoyment, handed, humor, me, much, taste
Just drank a big glass of water, and I regret to inform you, they might be right about hydration.

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2 months ago

big, drank, drink, glass, health, humor, hydration, i, inform, just, regret, right, water
Me, at the intervention: “Ah look, all the reasons I drink gathered in one place.”

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2 months ago

addiction, drink, event, gathering, humor, i, intervention, me, place, reasons, self-awareness, social, social event
If I would’ve known that you were going to ask me what I was thinking, I wouldn’t have been thinking what I was thinking.

0

2 months ago

confusion, going, humor, i, irony, me, mind, question, self-awareness, thinking, unexpected
Soccer: I love when they hold up the sign and a brand new, beautiful boy takes the place of a dirty, sweaty, ruined one.

0

2 months ago

activity, beautiful, boy, dirty, humor, i, love, new, place, replacement, sign, soccer, sport, sweaty
A swear jar for Twitter would end world hunger.

0

2 months ago

end, fundraising, humor, hunger, jar, media, satire, social, social media, swear, swear jar, Twitter, world, world hunger

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

79 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The Bible is 100% accurate when thrown at close range.

15 shares on Slack this month:

Today I bought a doughnut without sprinkles. This diet thing is hard.

47 shares on TikTok this month:

Whoops, lost myself for about eight years there.

73 shares on Discord this month:

The worst part of a fender bender is having to get out of your car and meet a new person.

30 shares on WhatsApp this month:

My optimism doesn’t come out of thin air. A flask is involved.

16 shares on LinkedIn this month:

We need an app where introverts can pay extroverts to make phone calls for them.

66 shares on Discord this month:

Dating scene and the job market are the same right now, just stay where you are.

46 shares on Reddit this month:

People who live in glass houses shouldn’t change clothes.

33 shares on Facebook this month:

I brake for no one, except squirrels.

26 shares on Slack this month:

Saw a guy reading a book and writing notes in it. Not enough words in there for ya, bud?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇧 has copied:

When I get the vibe from someone that fitting in is super important to them my first instinct is to bite them.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has viewed:

Not to brag, but my children already knew everything I told them today.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

Please twerk; I have just days left.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has viewed:

I remember when a computer didn’t automatically connect to the internet, it used to make a screaming noise. We should have listened.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

Never vacuuming so I don’t disrupt my carpet’s natural micro biome.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has viewed:

Putting mental health before my education is a good idea until it affects my education, which affects my mental health, which affects my education.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has downloaded:

Bugs have so many legs to make up for their lack of personality.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

The great thing about having a mouse in your house is that I’m sure it’s just the one mouse, probably.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has viewed:

Scientists say humans are the most evolved, but bears get to get fat all summer and then sleep for four months, so who’s really ahead.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has viewed:

They should invent a job that actually wants to hire you after you apply.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Snapchat:

Getting accused of using AI when you didn’t is like this century’s version of a witch allegation.

Just shared via Telegram:

The best time to start a family fight is now. It gets you out of buying relatives gifts.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I sent you a message telepathically and you didn’t respond. Are you mad at me?

Freshly posted on Messenger:

The economy’s so tough, people out here eating grass — matcha.

Seen just now on TikTok:

None of this is happening. It’s all in your phone.

Just landed via Reddit:

A dinosaur as a pet would solve so many problems. Mainly, people problems.

Just landed via Twitch:

Girl, are you an Uber driver? Because you are driving me to drink.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

I will be posting telepathically on all social media today. So if you think of something funny, that was me.

Trending via Pinterest:

Saturday nights are for watching zombie shows and dreaming about the apocalypse.

Going viral on Messenger:

Asking a film guy, “Who is that?” when Tom Cruise comes on screen just to feel something.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I’m gonna start telling men I know a spot and it’s just me dropping them off at therapy.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Coffee tastes so much better handed to me.

Just drank a big glass of water, and I regret to inform you, they might be right about hydration.

Me, at the intervention: “Ah look, all the reasons I drink gathered in one place.”

If I would’ve known that you were going to ask me what I was thinking, I wouldn’t have been thinking what I was thinking.

Soccer: I love when they hold up the sign and a brand new, beautiful boy takes the place of a dirty, sweaty, ruined one.

A swear jar for Twitter would end world hunger.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨