Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Want to know what someone is really like? Play Monopoly with them.
  • The first person to realize you can eat bone marrow must have really hated that cow.
  • Non-parents be like: I would simply instruct the toddler to do something he doesn’t want to do, and he would obey.
  • Nature is fascinating. A dandelion makes it through concrete, while I get my head stuck in my sweater in the morning.
  • I like winter because I fundamentally understand I deserve to suffer.
  • I will be posting telepathically on all social media today. So if you think of something funny, that was me.