Trendy Funny Quotes

  • I try not to laugh at my own jokes, but we all know I’m hilarious.
  • Horoscope: You will give blood generously this week, but it won’t be your idea.
  • Women know the exact weight of their children and their age in days. Men just know that little people live with them.
  • If you’re curious what the priciest item in a store is just bring a kid along because they’ll definitely find then break it.
  • I’m not superstitious because it brings bad luck.
  • If you make it through life without being portrayed in a murder documentary, take the win.