Trendy Funny Quotes

  • Stomach: I will now demonstrate a blue whale’s mating call.
  • Me gasping and flipping off the vultures as they circle above the running track.
  • If you knock down a policeman, they’ll get backup.
  • Can’t sleep because I keep finding exciting opportunities to get pissed off.
  • Please no more relationships that are supposed to be a lesson. I’m already quite the scholar.
  • Shoutout to my kids because they aren’t listening!