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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇷 has shared:

You don’t need fun to have alcohol.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has shared:

Tall people make me nervous. What the hell are you doing up there? Stop eating the leaves off that tree.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has copied:

When a girl is done with you, she talks to you like she’s in HR or something.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

Gonna start using “with all dude respect”.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has downloaded:

I’m not joining no alternate Twitter app. If this gets taken down, I’m starting a family.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has downloaded:

Horoscope: Many good things are in store for you! Unfortunately, the store is closed for repairs.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has shared:

If I ever go missing, check the snack aisle. I’m probably just deciding.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has downloaded:

I failed as a person; I’m a dinosaur now.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

I dropped and broke my phone today. Hurt more than childbirth!

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

Sunrises are really beautiful, but the timing is rather bad.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

805 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,967

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,967

15 minutes ago

3,445

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Slack:

Unpopular Opinion: Die Hard is a Harry Potter movie. He sneaks around a tower at night avoiding Alan Rickman.

Just landed via Pinterest:

My toxic trait is that I give my friends mental health advice when I belong in an asylum.

Live now on YouTube:

I wonder if people that fall asleep right away know that we hate them.

Just shared via WeChat:

Venn diagrams. You either love ‘em or you hate ‘em. Or you’re somewhere in the middle.

Trending via LinkedIn:

Spotify: enjoy the next 30 minutes commercial free. Also Spotify: we have no concept of time.

Seen just now on Slack:

Could a mosquito drink blood out of a cup or something or are they legally required to Capri Sun my legs all summer?

Making waves on Instagram:

Your brain automatically translates WTF but not LOL.

Seen just now on Discord:

Responding to any and all emails with ‘wow ok’

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Can’t stop thinking about that time at the planetarium where they showed us a picture of earth and everyone booed.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Have you noticed? When the relationship is new, the guy is never busy.

Authenticity is whispered, but bullshit is broadcasted.

5 months ago

Authenticity is whispered, but bullshit is broadcasted.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Ah, the age-old battle between authenticity and BS – it's like a subtle whisper dueling with a loudspeaker! 🗣️🤫 Let's be real, why whisper when you can shout nonsense, right? 🤥 Just remember, it's better to keep it real in the whispers than fake it in the broadcast! 😉🙌 #AuthenticWhispersVsBSBroadcasts

authenticity, broadcast, bullshit, communication, honesty, irony, whisper

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

805 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,967

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,967

15 minutes ago

3,429

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇩 has copied:

My life coach told me I didn’t make the team.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has downloaded:

Me, as a vampire: Tell me, mortal, have you had any alcohol in the last 24 hours?

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

I only see psychics so that I can keep arguing with dead relatives.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has downloaded:

The secret to my success is everywhere I go I wear a shirt that says STAFF on the back.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has downloaded:

The pigeons are plotting to overthrow the government. It will start with a coo.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has copied:

You can always tell when someone is on a diet by how they scrape every last bit from that yogurt container.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has copied:

I’m stuck between “I need to save money” and “You only live once.”

Someone from 🇧🇦 has copied:

I’m so single right now, I can’t even spell relayshaunship.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has viewed:

Home: Where I can look ugly and not care.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has shared:

My housemates are convinced our house is haunted. I’ve lived here for 274 years and not noticed anything strange.

Social Media Log 💫

Reported on Instagram:

You got beef with me, but none in your fridge. That’s why you’re mad. You’re hungry.

Seen just now on Twitch:

You say “multitask” like it’s a good thing.

Live now on TikTok:

Sometimes being on your phone all day is your destiny.

Just landed via YouTube:

Life can be so beautiful, you just can’t get sober.

Shared recently on YouTube:

It’s almost time to pack away the black summer clothes and unpack the black winter clothes.

Making waves on YouTube:

Did we do it, did we save the daylight?

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Not to brag but I gave someone directions and he made it.

Going viral on TikTok:

“You look happy.” Thanks, I stopped dating.

Making waves on TikTok:

Every McDonald’s should have a flag they fly at half mast when the ice cream machine is down.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

Lately life has been all panic no disco.

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