Trendy Funny Quotes

  • I’m not even a 2nd choice, I’m like an 8th choice, sometimes a 10th.
  • If anyone wants to contact me, from now on I can only be reached via my bank account.
  • I just sneezed my wife awake from a nap so any discussion about renewing vows is on hold for a bit.
  • Nobody shoots annoying people into the sun anymore and that’s why there are so many of them left on earth.
  • People said follow your dreams, so I went back to bed.
  • I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.