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Funny adult quotes

Oct 22
Share →: The adult version of “head, shoulders, knees and toes” is “wallet, glasses, keys and phone.”
Oct 7
Share →: 99% of celebrating your birthday as an adult just consists of texting back “thanks so much”.
Sep 22
Share →: Adulting means growing hair in places you’re not supposed to and losing hair in places you don’t want to.
Sep 22
Share →: I hate commas. It’s not my job to tell you when you breathe. Work it out, you’re a grown adult.
Sep 22
Share →: I am a full grown adult. Now listen to me discuss the various plot holes in Paw Patrol.
Sep 22
Share →: I’m slowly becoming an adult. Please make it stop.
Sep 22
Share →: Adulting in 3 words: it’s always something.
Sep 22
Share →: “Fries or salad?” sums up every adult decision you have to make.
Sep 22
Share →: I don’t want to adult today, I just want to dog. I’ll be lying down on the floor in the sun, you can pet me and bring me some snacks.
Sep 22
Share →: My parents often told me I would lose my own head if it wasn’t screwed on and now that I’m an adult, I want to know what tools I need to have it screwed off.