Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: Hell hath no fury like a sports bra being applied to a just showered but not 100% dry body.

Commentary:
Oh, the struggle is real! Watch out, folks, for the legendary battle between a clingy sports bra and a slightly damp body – it's a showdown of epic proportions! 🔥💦 Just when you thought post-shower routines couldn't get any more dramatic, the sports bra swoops in to steal the show. Hell hath no fury like a sports bra on a mission! 😅👙 #WetAndWildDrama
6 months ago
Share →: My body is a “wonder what happened” land.

Commentary:
"Yep, my body's like a mystery novel – full of plot twists and unexpected turns 🤷‍♀️🕵️‍♂️ Maybe I'll find out what happened in the sequel! 📖🔍"
6 months ago
Share →: “It’s swimsuit season” I say, eating another swimsuit.

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic swimsuit season dilemma: To wear the swimsuit or eat the swimsuit? 🤔👙🍔 Just making sure I'm well-prepped for all beach activities, right? 😅 #summerbodygoals"
6 months ago
Share →: Your brain needs exercise just as much as your body does. That’s why I think of running everyday.

Commentary:
"Running isn't just for the body, it's a marathon for the brain too! 🏃‍♂️💭 Who knew you could sweat out the mental blocks while clocking in those miles? Just imagine your brain running laps in a tiny track suit! 🧠🏋️‍♂️"
6 months ago
Share →: I’m not a dietitian, but if you eat pizza right at midnight your body doesn’t know if the calories go towards yesterday or today so they don’t count.

Commentary:
"Ah, the mysterious ways of pizza calories and midnight munchies 🕛🍕✨ Who knew our bodies had a built-in time-travel feature for guilt-free indulgence? Dietitians everywhere, probably."
6 months ago
Share →: I wish I could just drop my body off at the gym and pick it up later.

Commentary:
"Wouldn't that be just the dream? 🏋️‍♀️💪 No need for sweating or grunting, just a quick gym drop-off! Oh well, back to reality where we actually have to put in the work ourselves. 😅 #WishfulThinking"
6 months ago
Share →: Body: Time to sleep. Brain: Hey, that’s an interesting thought, here’s six billion more.

Commentary:
Body: Time to sleep. Brain: Hey, that's an interesting thought, here's six billion more. 🧠💭💤 When your brain hits you with a late-night brainstorming session just as you're drifting off to dreamland… Thanks, brain, but can we reschedule this meeting for, oh, never? 😂🌙 #OveractiveBrain #LateNightMusings
6 months ago
Share →: Handshakes should be banned. Touch our naked body parts together for all the world to see? Gross!

Commentary:
"Who needs handshakes when we can awkwardly wiggle our elbow bumps instead? Less germ-sharing, more entertainment value! 💪🏼🦠 #ElbowBumpsForTheWin"
6 months ago
Share →: I am a person who wants to get a lot done, trapped in the body of a person who wants to sleep in and take naps at times.

Commentary:
"Ah, the eternal struggle between productivity and bed's seductive embrace! 💤💼 It's a daily battle of ambitions vs. comfort, a tale as old as time… or at least as old as the snooze button! ⏰😅 Who will win today, the go-getter or the snoozer? Stay tuned for the thrilling sequel: 'The Procrastination of Napping'. 😂"
6 months ago
Share →: When I was a young boy, the doctor told me I had a lazy eye. By the time I was 50, it had spread to the rest of my body.

Commentary:
Well, sounds like that lazy eye wasn't so lazy after all – it just needed some time to motivate the rest of the body to join in on the fun! 🤪💪 Who knew being lazy could be so contagious? 🤣 #LazyEyeGoals