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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇲 has shared:

I never had a year with this much thinking. I’ve been thinking since the 1st.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has bookmarked:

Every house has a smell that only the people living in it don’t smell.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

An interviewer asked me how well I can perform under pressure; I said I’m much better at Bohemian Rhapsody.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has bookmarked:

Twitter is diarrhea of the mouth at its finest. Everyone is just going around vomiting whatever is in their brains.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

Twitter actually is my diary, so you’re not allowed to get mad at the things I post. You’re not even supposed to be reading this. Why were you going through my stuff?

Someone from 🇬🇷 has copied:

My dating era has come to an end. I’d like to thank those who participated.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has downloaded:

I don’t trust anyone who gets enraged over messed-up fast food orders.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has shared:

Never underestimate the healing power of a grilled cheese sandwich.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

Very confusing that gross pay is before tax. I always find the number way grosser after tax.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has shared:

I’m bored, but not “read a book for fun” bored.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

643 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,236

Funny Quotes Topics

17,359

Funny Quotes Images

15,236

Updated

Dec 30, 2025

Users Online

3,838

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Snapchat:

That pen in the junk drawer that hasn’t been used in four years picked today to have an attitude.

Trending via Discord:

Deleting dating apps because I want to meet someone the old fashioned way (he and his donkey rescue me from a tower guarded by a dragon).

Shared recently on Reddit:

Good morning everyone, who feels like working today? I promise I’ll let you do my job.

Going viral on Snapchat:

The most refreshing way to fight your personal demons is to make demonade.

Trending via Discord:

Because of my looks, everyone only wants one thing from me, that I leave them alone.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

Being a millennial means finding out you can’t afford to live in that apartment complex you thought was really shady when you were a kid.

Making waves on Twitch:

Washing machine minutes are not the same as regular minutes.

Just shared via Telegram:

You should be able to call out of work if your partner is so cozy and warm in the morning.

Going bananas on Facebook:

Nobody sighs louder than an unemployed, debt-free dog who spends at least 16 hours a day sleeping.

Seen just now on X:

My résumé is really just a list of things I hope I never have to do again.

Funny brain damage quotes

Funny brain damage quotes 🧠😂 bring a lighthearted twist to serious moments, turning confusion into comedy! Whether you’re looking to laugh at life’s quirks or brighten someone’s day with a clever spin, these witty lines add humor to the unexpected. Get ready to smile, giggle, and maybe even snort as we explore the funniest takes on brain fog and quirky mishaps! 🎉🤣 #LaughItOff #BrainyHumor

New funny brain damage quotes 👇

All funny brain damage quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

91 shares on Threads this month:

Too many losers and not enough people telling them they’re losers.

19 shares on WeChat this month:

Sex is cool, but have you ever made peace with the horror of being alive.

31 shares on Slack this month:

I can keep my mouth shut, but you can read the subtitles on my face.

30 shares on WhatsApp this month:

That awkward shopping moment when someone is standing in front of the items you need and you pretend you’re shopping for something else because they just won’t budge.

55 shares on LinkedIn this month:

If alcohol was the one that was banned instead of weed, then a lot of people would have had memories of hungry, stoned fathers instead of angry, drunk ones.

13 shares on Twitch this month:

Schedule your appointment early in the month before your dentist starts fretting about their next boat payment.

92 shares on WeChat this month:

Don’t fall for me — I’ll treat you right, and you’ll get bored and cheat.

23 shares on Snapchat this month:

I have three kids. I should be terrified of sex.

54 shares on Snapchat this month:

My favorite color is sunshine.

10 shares on Slack this month:

This too shall pass, but what the hell?

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

13 folks are currently checking 👀

There should be a socially acceptable way to say, “I’m not sure what to say to that. Can you please say something different?”.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I love eating fast food and getting big and fat. It’s amazing.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Put my too-weak notice in at the gym.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Manifesting you in my bed.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Traffic is the fault of the guy immediately in front of you.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Most meetings end with the conclusion that everything needs to be discussed in another meeting.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

You can’t change your past but you can change your pasta.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Listen up. If he hooks his sunglasses in the front collar of his shirt, he’s got something important to say.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Adding geologist to my resume after hitting rock bottom.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

What do you even say when someone knocks on your bathroom stall … like, what’s the protocol?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

643 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,236

Funny Quotes Topics

17,359

Funny Quotes Images

15,236

Updated

Dec 30, 2025

Users Online

4,021

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

Can we normalize arguing with little kids? They’re so rude.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has downloaded:

I’m that person who will restart a song because I got distracted and wasn’t appreciating it enough.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

Bluesky honestly feels like a miracle where you take the most annoying people in the world and stick them in a broken elevator together.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has downloaded:

I bet she doesn’t even laugh at your dumb jokes the fake way I did.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has viewed:

I took some free community martial arts lessons for self-defense, but I’m starting to think Tai Chi is too slow for most muggers.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

Santa: “Don’t leave me milk. Leave me whiskey.”

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

Waiting for my wife to approve my new year’s resolution of making independent decisions.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has bookmarked:

When God closes a door, he opens a window. Unfortunately, we are in a submarine.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has bookmarked:

Sorry I’m late. It’s just because of who I am as a person.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

This is the fastest December in the history of all December.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

Those guys holding fish in their dating profile pictures are just demonstrating how they’ll carry you over the threshold after marriage.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Shut up brain, I wasn’t even talking to me.

Spotted on Messenger:

My immune system told me it’s a lover not a fighter.

Just landed via Discord:

Sure, my internet service is overpriced and spotty but you can’t put a price on unintentionally being dropped from every Zoom meeting.

Spotted on Snapchat:

If you inject Botox into a raisin, does it turn back into a grape?

Live now on Messenger:

The best time to visit Japan is when you have money!

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

The first person to throw out bath water: Uh oh.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Jokes on you, unknown number. I barely answer my phone for people I know.

Shared recently on Facebook:

When my cat gets in trouble I call him by his full name, Catthew.

Seen just now on Threads:

Twitter is fun because you can post a pic of pizza and people will get mad at you.

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