Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

Statistically speaking, people don’t object enough at weddings.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

I hate when I change the battery in the bathroom scale, and it starts telling the truth again.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has copied:

Perhaps the most universal American experience is your mom being like, “Wasn’t he such a good dentist? He’s in prison now.”

Someone from 🇹🇯 has shared:

At my size, I’d be called Buffet the Vampire Slayer.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has shared:

I like to play this fun game while I clean out the fridge called what is this, how long has it been in here and how do I kill it?

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

I just need a little time to warm up to you, and then I’ll be super fun, I promise—1-2 years at most.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has shared:

I would like to unsubscribe from all responsibilities, please and thank you.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

Washing your face is actually multitasking because you are also washing your hands and forearms and shirt and countertop and feet and floor and hair.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has copied:

Shout out to all the experts on the web who know everything there is to know about absolutely everything.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has copied:

I think I may need professional help. A chef, a butler and a maid should do it!

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,640

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

Back in the office this morning, trying to remember what I do for work.

Just landed via WeChat:

Having to write cover letters is so dumb. Do you really believe my dream ever since I was a little girl was to work for you? No. It was to ride a pony on a funky space rainbow. Grow up.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

When old people say, “Long as you happy,” that means you’re pretty dumb.

Spotted on Reddit:

Me before grocery shopping: only healthy foods, no impulse buys, I can do this. Me during grocery shopping: they make chocolate filled marshmallows?

Spotted on Discord:

You will meet a girl who is very strange and a little bit evil. It’s really important that you don’t lose me.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Why is it cute when a baby falls asleep clutching a bottle. Yet, when I do it, it’s “concerning”?

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

This economy requires two hustlers working together – not a hustler and a leech. It’s too expensive to be out here carrying dead weight.

Trending via Telegram:

I’m a big believer in not going to work on your birthday!

Shared recently on Threads:

I’m not always annoying, sometimes I sleep too.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

8 year gap on resume that just says “karate”.

12 Funny cheeseburger quotes

Funny cheeseburger quotes add a delightful twist to everyone’s favorite juicy treat. 🍔😂 From playful jabs at cheeseburger cravings to witty observations about this iconic meal, these quotes celebrate the joy and humor of enjoying a cheeseburger. Savor a laugh and indulge in the fun side of this delicious comfort food! 🍔😂

New funny cheeseburger quotes 👇

For even more funny cheeseburger quotes, hit next 👇

All funny cheeseburger quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

65 shares on Discord this month:

Look, a three-day weekend is all I ask. The rest can be four-day weekends.

42 shares on YouTube this month:

People on diet aren’t mad at you. They’re mad at their lunch.

95 shares on Instagram this month:

The people who are $30 trillion in debt are giving you a credit score.

38 shares on Twitch this month:

I really don’t believe all of these women are actually named “Sassy”

83 shares on Instagram this month:

I’m just so lazy because I’m still recovering from the fact that I used to be the fastest sperm.

36 shares on YouTube this month:

Feeling guilty for taking up the entire therapy session talking about myself.

78 shares on Messenger this month:

Need someone to feed me Doritos while I read, so I don’t mess up the pages. No weirdos.

73 shares on Messenger this month:

My car accidentally drove to a burger shop again. I hate when it does that.

28 shares on Discord this month:

Cowboy outfits should be called ranch dressing.

41 shares on Discord this month:

People always ask me why there’s a chair in my shower. Who the hell eats breakfast standing up?

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

9 folks are currently checking 👀

They’re uploading my consciousness into a disposable vape.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

“Your boos mean nothing to me. I’ve seen what you cheer.” Is a goated doctrine. If Rick and Morty gave us anything, it gave us that.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

You’re like if “nope” was a person.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I love the idea of a fruitarian, just morally affronted that anyone could eat a baby spinach.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Hey cell phone companies who play smooth jazz hold music hoping I’ll lose interest and give up: yeah, it’s kinda working.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

My doctor no longer prescribes me Viagra. He just left me hanging.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Here’s to another day of outward smiles and inward screams.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Fun prank: make people study for 16 years, and then don’t give them jobs.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I would rather walk barefoot across a carpet made out of Legos than go to my high school reunion.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

You know it’s bad when people start telling you, you are the strongest person they’ve ever met.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,675

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇦 has downloaded:

Not to brag, but I can put my socks on without sitting down.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has shared:

Why is it called Christian community and not Holyfans?

Someone from 🇨🇬 has shared:

The best part about getting added to a group chat is leaving two weeks later.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

That moment when you clean the apartment and a year later everything is dirty again.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

Ex’s be like “I gave you everything”. Yeah, trust issues.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has bookmarked:

I just start doing the Macarena when I want to end conversations now.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has shared:

It’s amazing how so many people can rave about Star Wars or Star Trek and at the same time make sure that the only realistic future prospect is Mad Max.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has viewed:

The best part of my kid graduating was unsubscribing from the school’s text messages.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

No we can’t hangout, you’ll end up falling in love with me and I don’t have time for that.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has bookmarked:

Today I ate vegetable lasagna… I don’t want to talk about it.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Discord:

Thanks to rice cakes, I still can’t imagine nothingness, but now I know what it tastes like.

Spotted on YouTube:

Opening up is like talking to a cop: anything you say can and will be used against you.

Going bananas on X:

Here’s the problem with fruit: it’s inconsistent. Some apples are delicious, some taste bad. Sometimes blueberries are great, sometimes they are disgusting. You know what’s the same every time? Doritos.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Opening a bakery and calling it “I’m a crepe. I’m a weird dough.”

Seen just now on Facebook:

Have to connect the printer to my new laptop, and my goal is to cry no more than three times.

Trending via Messenger:

Your call is really important to us but first enjoy this clarinet number for the next seventy five minutes.

Going viral on Slack:

Having a daughter is like having a little broke best friend who thinks you’re rich.

Making waves on X:

Just accidentally closed a tab I’ve had been meaning to read for the past 2 years.

Breaking via Threads:

Descibe your boobs only using a picture of them.

Live now on Telegram:

If you want your kid to play with their toy just give it to your other kid. Follow me for more parenting hacks.

© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴