Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: Sleep with each other, or someone else will!

Commentary:
"Better cozy up together before the bedbugs start swiping right! 😂🛌🔥 #CuddleOrCompete"
6 months ago
Share →: You can always tell when a man is dating someone new. Why you going to the aquarium and the museum?

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic 'trying to impress' phase of dating! 🐠🖼️ Who needs fancy dinners when you can just admire fish and art together, right? 😄 #datingnewbie"
6 months ago
Share →: Whoops, accidentally said I couldn’t make it before they even said the date.

Commentary:
"Talk about jumping the gun! 🤦‍♂️ Maybe your calendar predicted the future date? Or you’ve mastered the art of time travel? ⏳ Either way, oopsie! 😅 #TooEager"
6 months ago
Share →: Deleted old Tweets just in case I date a very famous woman with rabid fans.

Commentary:
"Just doing some social media spring cleaning… you never know when you might suddenly find yourself in the spotlight with a mob of passionate fans at your doorstep! 🧹📱 Better to be safe than sorry, right? 😅 #DeletedTweets #FamousLoveLife"
6 months ago
Share →: If all men are the same, why does it take women so long to choose one?

Commentary:
Ah, the eternal mystery of the dating world 🕵️‍♂️🤔 Perhaps it's because women are searching for that elusive diamond in the rough 💎 or maybe they're just enjoying the buffet of options 🍽️🍷 One thing's for sure, it's all part of the fun and games of love and romance! 💘😄
6 months ago
Share →: Restaurant toilets are dangerous! So many of my dates have gone to use them and vanished.

Commentary:
Oh no, sounds like those toilets are serving as secret escape routes for some elusive dates! 👀 Maybe they've been lured away by the call of the wild…or maybe they just got lost in the maze of toilet stalls? 🚽💨 Dates disappearing into thin air at the restaurant? Time to investigate or start serving a GPS service with the meals! 🕵️‍♂️🍽️
6 months ago
Share →: Hi, where do you meet someone without dating apps and if you never leave your apartment? I need tips, please. Urgently!

Commentary:
Ah, the eternal struggle of the modern recluse on a quest for love! 🕵️‍♂️🚪 Who needs dating apps when you've got the mystery of the unknown neighbor next door or the dashing delivery person who brings your takeout? 🌮💌 Remember, romance can be found in the unlikeliest of places… like the laundry room or the self-checkout line at the grocery store! 🧺🛒 Just remember to
6 months ago
Share →: Friday the 13th doesn’t even feel creepy cause bad things happen everyday now.

Commentary:
"Ah, Friday the 13th – just another day in the life when bad luck is like, 'hold my beer' 🍀🌙 Why be afraid of superstitions when reality is out here pulling pranks every day? 😅 #FridayVibes"
6 months ago
Share →: Hot singles in your area! They don’t want to talk to you. But they’re there.

Commentary:
"Hot singles in your area! 🌶️💔 They're like elusive unicorns – tempting but always out of reach. Better luck next time, champ! 😜"
6 months ago
Share →: I will never give another woman my heart until I see how she acts when a bee flies at her.

Commentary:
"I will never give another woman my heart until I see how she acts when a bee flies at her." 🐝🚫💔

Because let's face it, how someone handles a bee encounter says a lot about their true character! 😂🙌 #BeeBraveryRequired