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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇯 has bookmarked:

Some people can start a task and then just finish it instead of trying to do a hundred things at once, like a squirrel on crack.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has viewed:

The difference between the Olympic village and a normal village is that not everyone in the Olympic village is related to each other.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has copied:

Some people pack their lives so full of activities, appointments and people that I get exhausted just reading about it.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has shared:

Babies first steal your glasses and then bite your nose. I don’t know where they get their reputation.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has viewed:

Adult peer pressure is seeing your neighbor mow his lawn.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

Did we do it, did we save the daylight?

Someone from 🇸🇻 has bookmarked:

Grateful for independence mostly because British food is gross.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has copied:

Some 100 private jets will fly to Venice for Jeff Bezos’ wedding, and I recycle yoghurt cup lids.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

Forget tequila, I’m at the age where you can wake up with a hangover from Netflix.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has bookmarked:

Ladies, if a man says he will fix something, he will. There is no need to remind him every 6 months about it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

824 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,986

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,986

21 seconds ago

3,433

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Threads:

Coffee, because I don’t have time for a manslaughter charge.

Live now on WhatsApp:

I need money, not feelings.

Reported on YouTube:

The PhD student is someone who foregoes their current happiness in order to forego future happiness.

Spotted on WeChat:

Vacation is a time when every part of you can relax except your bowels.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Apparently there is a bird fight club who holds their meetings outside my window at about 5am.

Making waves on Discord:

I decided to be me and now we have a problem.

Just shared via Instagram:

I hate it when people threaten to come over. Now I’ve got to do 2 years of housework in 30 minutes.

Just shared via Slack:

I ran out of toilet paper so I had to start using old newspapers. The Times are rough.

Going viral on Reddit:

For years I thought an oncologist was just the doctor they kept on-call at all times.

Seen just now on Slack:

Sometimes somebody will share something from way back in my timeline, and I’ll think, “Oh God, what all did they see to get there?”

Home » Funny Entertainment Quotes » Page 15

146 Funny entertainment quotes

More funny entertainment quotes 👇

6 months ago
Share →: Netflix & by yourself.

Commentary:
"Netflix & by yourself: the ultimate duo for a wild Friday night 🍿📺 Who needs a party when you've got the best company around? 😂 #NetflixAndChillByMyself"
6 months ago
Share →: Nothing more humbling than being at a karaoke birthday party with a bunch of singers.

Commentary:
"Ah yes, the ultimate test of vocal prowess and humility – karaoke with a group of singers 🎤🎂 It's like the Olympics of 'Please Don't Stop Believin'' 😉 #KaraokeProblems"
6 months ago
Share →: Lawyers should get walk-up songs in court like how wrestlers do.

Commentary:
Oh, can you imagine the drama and excitement in the courtroom if lawyers strutted in to their own walk-up songs like wrestlers do? 💼🎵 "Here comes the Judge" playing for intense moments and "Smooth Criminal" for smooth-talking attorneys. Just don't let them slam the gavel too dramatically! ⚖️🎶 #LegalShowdown
6 months ago
Share →: That moment when you finish watching a TV series and you don’t know what to do with your life any more.

Commentary:
📺 "When you reach the end of a TV series and suddenly realize your entire existence was just a season finale plot twist… What now? Do we just start the series all over again or take up a new hobby like extreme ironing? Decisions, decisions! 🤔😅"
6 months ago
Share →: Do you scroll through Netflix to find a good show for your dog to watch when you leave the house or are you normal?

Commentary:
"Ah, the age-old dilemma: to Netflix and bark or to not Netflix and bark? 🤔🐾 Normal is just a setting on the dryer, right? 🧺🐶 #DogParentLife"
6 months ago
Share →: What pushes you to watch 19 seasons of people in a hospital?

Commentary:
"Sometimes it takes 19 seasons of hospital drama to cure the Monday blues 🏥💉✨ Who needs medical school when you've got Netflix therapy, am I right? 😄 #bingewatchingforhealth"

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Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

824 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,986

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,986

21 seconds ago

3,433

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

When I finally snap it’ll be because I had to type my email address in on the TV.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has copied:

Demi Lovato is short for demilitarized love potato.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has downloaded:

Who called it a deep freeze instead of ice-o-lation?

Someone from 🇭🇳 has shared:

Sorry for not keeping in touch. I literally have nothing to say.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

Remember when the FBI would threaten you at the beginning of every VHS tape? That was pretty cool.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has viewed:

Without freedom of speech, we wouldn’t know who the idiots are.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

The great thing about having a mouse in your house is that I’m sure it’s just the one mouse, probably.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has downloaded:

I will not accept a hint. I will act dumb until you say it clearly to me.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has viewed:

Anything is an appetizer if you eat more food after.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has downloaded:

I don’t understand construction. Like, how do they know what to do next?

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on TikTok:

I always thought that aunts had a lot of money. Until I became one myself.

Live now on Messenger:

It’s hard to sleep knowing that cake is in the fridge.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Girl math is crying for two hours and then realizing it wasn’t that deep.

Going viral on TikTok:

Me, first week as a volunteer firefighter thinking we only rescue cats: We’re going where?

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

When I like a song, I repeat it until the artist comes out and ask for water.

Live now on Telegram:

Did you know that if you listen to any Black Sabbath album backwards, you can hear them singing backwards?

Spreading quickly via Slack:

I hate it when I’m cleaning the house and suddenly find a bowl of ice cream in my lap and my soap opera on.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Valentine’s Day is a stupid and made up holiday unless someone wants to give me a present in which case I really believe in celebrating it.

Making waves on YouTube:

It’s not about the cards you’re dealt, but how you play the hand you’ve got hidden up your sleeve.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Skin coloured leggings should be illegal.

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