25 Funny failure quotes

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  1 week ago

  View →: Let the example of my fluke success guide nearly all of you to crushing disappointment.
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  2 weeks ago

  View →: I’m not falling for it again. These missions have been successful 8 times already.
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  1 month ago

  View →: I don’t know about you guys, but when I have to make a decision I analyze the situation, evaluate the risk, take measures to limit the consequences and then I completely screw up.
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  1 month ago

  View →: I’ve never met a problem I couldn’t turn into a disaster.
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  3 months ago

  View →: Tried to be a responsible adult today. Won’t be doing that again.
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  3 months ago

  View →: No one is shocked when a defibrillator doesn’t work.
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  3 months ago

  View →: Trying is the first step toward failure.
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  3 months ago

  View →: Failed relationships can be described as so much wasted make-up.
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  3 months ago

  View →: My front facing camera got me looking like a failed science project.
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  4 months ago

  View →: My life coach told me I didn’t make the team.
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  4 months ago

  View →: For someone who is afraid of failure, I’m very unmotivated.
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  4 months ago

  View →: “You win some. You lose some.” Me, after losing for the millionth time in a row.
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  4 months ago

  View →: It’s really hard to come back after a poorly executed high five.
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  4 months ago

  View →: There’s nothing that I hate more than a failed nap attempt.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Everyone is a genius until they try to use someone else’s microwave.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Some people are living proof that brain failure does not immediately lead to death.
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  4 months ago

  View →: I failed as a person; I’m a dinosaur now.
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  4 months ago

  View →: If at first you don’t succeed, it’s only attempted murder.
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  4 months ago

  View →: I’ve already broken all my resolutions and like four commandments.
• 

  4 months ago

  View →: Being a serial killer is much like being a comedian, in that you either hit it big and get your own Netflix special, or you spend eternity popping up on shitty podcasts.
• 

  4 months ago

  View →: I come from a family of failed magicians. I have two half sisters.
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  5 months ago

  View →: “Well, at least things can’t get any worse” has turned out to be a failure of my imagination.
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  5 months ago

  View →: If at first you don’t succeed, try two more times so your failure is statistically significant.
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  5 months ago

  View →: If at first you don’t succeed, that’s so embarrassing. Why are you so bad at this?
• 

  5 months ago

  View →: If at first you don’t succeed then skydiving definitely isn’t for you.

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