25 Funny funny comparison quotes

• Checking my iced coffee rewards points like it’s my 401k.

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  1 month ago

  401k, addiction, caffeine, caffeine addiction, checking, coffee, coffee lover, comparison, finance, finance humor, funny comparison, humor, iced, iced coffee, lover, personal, personal finance, point, reward, reward point, rewards

• Shazam-ing a song in public feels the same as taking out a big hammer and bonking yourself on the head.

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  2 months ago

  awkward, awkward moment, big, bonk, comparison, feels, funny comparison, hammer, head, moment, music, music recognition, public, recognition, same, Shazam, song, taking, yourself

• I’ve never wrestled an angry alligator, but I have taken off a wet sports bra in the middle of summer. So, same thing.

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  2 months ago

  alligator, angry, bra, comparison, funny comparison, humor, i, middle, never, same, sports, sports bra, struggle, summer, taken, thing, wet, wrestling

• You know when a donkey followed Shrek home and just kept talking? That’s what it’s like having kids.

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  2 months ago

  character, comparison, donkey, funny comparison, having, home, humor, just, kid, kids, know, movie, movie character, parenting, Shrek, talking

• Coke tastes like tapping into your ancient ancestral petroleum reserves, while Sprite tastes like being connected to a big, beautiful energy grid.

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  2 months ago

  ancestral, ancestral petroleum, ancient, beautiful, being, beverage, big, coke, comparison, energy, energy grid, funny comparison, grid, humor, petroleum, soda, Sprite, taste, while

• Expecting your first baby’s exciting, but have you ever ordered a new coffee machine?

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  2 months ago

  baby, coffee, coffee machine, comparison, daily, daily life, ever, excitement, exciting, funny comparison, humor, life, machine, new, new purchase, parenting, purchase

• “It’s Raining Men” and “Let the Bodies Hit the Floor” are the same song from different points of view.

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  2 months ago

  comedy, comparison, culture, different, floor, funny comparison, hit, humor, humorous, humorous quote, joke, let, men, music, music joke, parody, pop, pop culture, same, song, song parody, view

• Non-alcoholic beer is like a vibrator without batteries: it fills you up nicely but without the buzz…

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  2 months ago

  battery, beer, beverage, buzz, comparison, dry, dry humor, funny comparison, humor, joke, lack, lack of buzz, nicely, non-alcoholic, non-alcoholic beer, sarcastic, vibrator

• Theo Von’s entire life is like a raccoon that visits New York City.

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  2 months ago

  analogy, animal, city, comparison, funny comparison, humor, life, new, New York City, quirky, raccoon, theo, Theo Von, urban, urban life, visits, von, york

• Incense sticks are just disappointing sparklers.

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  2 months ago

  comparison, disappointment, expectations, funny comparison, humor, incense, incense stick, just, sparkler, stick

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