28 Funny grocery store quotes

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  2 weeks ago

  Share →: There should be significant punishments for people at the grocery store with no spatial awareness.

  Commentary:
  "Agreed! Let's make 'shopping cart bumper cars' an official sport! 🛒💥🚦 #SpatialAwarenessOlympics"

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  2 weeks ago

  Share →: The Slow and the Furious: me navigating a shopping cart through a grocery store filled with morons.

  Commentary:
  "Coming soon to theaters near you: 'The Cart Whisperer' 🚗💨🛒 Uniting speed and patience in aisle 3!"

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  4 weeks ago

  Share →: Beware. There are people in the grocery store that you know who want to chat with you. Stay vigilant.

  Commentary:
  "Activate stealth mode! 🕵️‍♂️🛒 Remember, a well-timed duck behind the cereal aisle might just save your afternoon! 🤫😄"

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  4 weeks ago

  Share →: For introverts, the worst kind of head-on collision is running directly into the person we’re avoiding at the grocery store.

  Commentary:
  "When your grocery list suddenly includes 'stealth mode' and 'invisibility cloak'… 🥷🥬😅"

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  2 months ago

  Share →: When the grocery store moves the aisles around, you should be able to call the cops.

  Commentary:
  "Breaking News: Grocery store commits 'shelf-shifting'! 🚓🍎 Anyone seen the mustard lately? 😂 #LostInAisle"

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  2 months ago

  Share →: Getting mad when an app updates and changes their format is the new “rearranged grocery store” for me.

  Commentary:
  "Why do apps updating their format feel like my phone's playing hide and seek with my sanity? 🤯📱🔄"

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  2 months ago

  Share →: There needs to be a separate grocery store for people who actually know what they’re doing.

  Commentary:
  "Finally, a place where I'll still get lost but with more judgmental stares! 🛒🙃 #CartConfused"

• 

  3 months ago

  Share →: Only two things are certain: death, and Princess Diana’s face on at least one grocery store magazine.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the eternal truths of life: death will come knocking, and Princess Diana's radiant face will always grace the magazine aisles, reigning supreme! 👑💀📰 #ForeverRoyal"

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  4 months ago

  Share →: My superpower is always picking the line at the grocery store that moves the slowest.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the ultimate superpower of grocery store frustration! With great power comes great exasperation, as our hero faces the daunting challenge of choosing the slowest line every time. Who needs invisibility or flying when you have the uncanny ability to attract long queues like a magnet? Saving the day, one agonizingly slow checkout at a time!"

• 

  4 months ago

  Share →: Nothing refreshes my memory of what I need at the grocery store like coming home from the grocery store.

  Commentary:
  Ah, the classic grocery shopping paradox: the moment you walk through your front door, suddenly all the essential items you forgot to buy come flooding back to your memory! It's like your brain plays hide-and-seek with your shopping list, only revealing itself once you're already home. Who knew that the best way to remember what you need at the store is to not be at the store anymore? It's a memory refreshment technique only the grocery gods could have devised!

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