Funny quotes grocery store

21 Funny grocery store quotes

Only two things are certain: death, and Princess Diana’s face on at least one grocery store magazine.

Funny Quotes Mar 18, 2025

My superpower is always picking the line at the grocery store that moves the slowest.

Funny Quotes Feb 25, 2025

Nothing refreshes my memory of what I need at the grocery store like coming home from the grocery store.

Funny Quotes Feb 25, 2025

You ever get road rage while walking behind someone moving slowly at the grocery store?

Funny Quotes Feb 2, 2025

One day you’re cool and then the next, you realize your favorite pair of pants are sweatpants from the grocery store.

Funny Quotes Feb 1, 2025

Sorry I’m late, my song came on at the grocery store.

Funny Quotes Jan 28, 2025

Nothing prepared me for how much of my adult life would be spent hiding from people I know at the grocery store.

Funny Quotes Jan 28, 2025

Not to brag but I always pick the slowest moving checkout line at the grocery store.

Funny Quotes Jan 28, 2025

Traumatized people will navigate emergency situations with calm surety but then have an anxiety attack in a grocery store.

Funny Quotes Jan 28, 2025

I like when the rain is misty and you get to feel like a grocery store broccoli for a little while.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

Overheard a baby crying in the grocery store the other day so I went over and joined him. I get it, little dude, life is hard.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

Deleted all dating apps, instead I’m just going to walk into a grocery store and look confused.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

At the grocery store, but forgot my wife’s list so I guess I’ll just follow this other guy around and get what he gets.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

I don’t know how to explain it, but sometimes cheese just falls into my cart at the grocery store.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

What if they close grocery stores and we have to hunt for our food? I don’t even know where the little gummy bears live.

Funny Quotes Jan 25, 2025

Got thrown out of the grocery store for holding a rotisserie chicken up like Simba again.

Funny Quotes Jan 24, 2025

I don’t normally like to brag about expensive trips but I just got back from the grocery store.

Funny Quotes Jan 23, 2025

In my 20’s: might hit the club tonight. In my 40’s: might go to the grocery store to listen to some bangers.

Funny Quotes Jan 22, 2025

Accidentally made eye contact with the sweets at the grocery store and now have to declare bankruptcy.

Funny Quotes Jan 22, 2025

Went to the grocery store hungry. I didn’t need to pay rent this month anyway.

Funny Quotes Jan 22, 2025

I have decided to purchase the grocery store because it is now cheaper than the groceries inside it.

Funny Quotes Jan 20, 2025