Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇨 has copied:

My wife didn’t order anything from Amazon yesterday, so the driver gave us a knock this morning to make sure we were OK.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has copied:

If I sing “Hello” and you think of “Lionel Richie” and not “Adele,” then you can probably predict the weather with one of your knees.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has downloaded:

My neighbor won’t stop talking about his Rolex and I can’t believe someone stole it tomorrow.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has viewed:

I’m so lazy that I get jealous when it’s bedtime in other countries.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has copied:

These quiet electric cars are really annoying. I have to stop scrolling and look up while walking outside now.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

Writing is so fun because you get to google things like “woman names”.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has downloaded:

Dear Black Friday… We all have big TVs now, put the groceries on sale.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

A dating app that matches people by the conspiracy theories they are interested in.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has shared:

Every year I realize how dumb I was a year ago.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has viewed:

Girl math is deactivating social media accounts to avoid only one person.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

243 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,512

Funny Quotes Topics

17,578

Funny Quotes Images

15,512

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,701

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via TikTok:

Your brain automatically translates WTF but not LOL.

Seen just now on Slack:

Imagine hating me and I don’t notice.

Going viral on X:

White guys have a slur for other white guys they don’t respect, it’s called ‘buddy.’

Just shared via Facebook:

Children really brighten up a home. They never turn the lights off, …

Just shared via Facebook:

Not only do I turn down my radio to find a house or a parking spot, but I also take off my sunglasses to hear someone better.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Returned my 3D printer, but not before making a 3D printer with it.

Just landed via WeChat:

Hey, people, my age. Remember going into the computer lab at school?

Seen just now on Reddit:

For Halloween, you should be mine.

Funny mantis quotes

New funny mantis quotes 👇

At this point of my celibacy, I can see the same colors as mantis shrimp. What do you know about blorange and gurple?

0

2 months ago

blorange, celibacy, colors, gurple, humor, i, imagination, know, mantis, mantis shrimp, point, same, sarcasm, shrimp, vivid, vivid imagination

Someone from 🇨🇿 has recently bookmarked this quote.

55 shares on WeChat this month.

All funny mantis quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

15 shares on YouTube this month:

Once again I feel like I slept in a washing machine.

63 shares on Pinterest this month:

Accidentally made eye contact with the sweets at the grocery store and now have to declare bankruptcy.

70 shares on TikTok this month:

“Are you busy tomorrow?” That entirely depends on what you need me to do.

86 shares on TikTok this month:

Calling it a situationship, and the whole time, the situation is that they don’t want you.

42 shares on Discord this month:

Back to the Future and chill?

41 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I’ve been saving these cleavage crumbs just for you babe.

79 shares on Threads this month:

There’s a Marie Antoinette feeling in the air.

64 shares on Reddit this month:

I feel like everyone who has ever had a hamster has some kind of traumatic experience with it.

59 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Are you my appendix? Cause you seem kind of useless to me.

70 shares on Instagram this month:

Knowledge is like underwear. It is useful to have it, but not necessary to show it off.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇭 has copied:

Enjoy it now because you’re only going to get older and fatter.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has bookmarked:

Half of my problems are because I said “sure” instead of “no.”

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

I bet there’s a couple of seconds on that medieval torture stretcher rack where it feels incredible.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has viewed:

Never forget that your fave celebs were trying to sell you cartoon monkey pictures during a pandemic.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has copied:

I got a raise! On my meds dosage. But still.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has viewed:

A plus of getting older is not having to make as much small talk because half the conversation is spent asking the other person to repeat what they just said.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has shared:

Hello, boyfriend? It’s me, girlfriend, from dating?

Someone from 🇻🇺 has bookmarked:

Went for a walk. Very pleasant evening. The squirrels and rabbits kept running away from me. That stung a little. I will remember their faces.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

My kids think I’m going to miss them when they leave for college, but I’ll be busy drinking my coffee while it’s still hot.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has bookmarked:

Some people don’t have a permanent handwriting. It depends on their mood and the pen they use.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Instagram:

I had a sex dream last night that felt so real, I’m just gonna go ahead and add it to my body count.

Spotted on TikTok:

Carrying a conversation counts as cardio.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Wearing expensive perfume to work feels like such a waste. This should be under someone’s full body weight, not in a corporate setting.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

I accidentally bought a pair of nose-cancelling headphones and now my glasses keep falling off.

Just shared via Twitch:

Adults chasing the popularity they missed out on as teenagers are the worst.

Trending via Instagram:

Sorry, I had feelings. I’ll replace them with jokes right away.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

I’m sorry I said “I look forward to working with you” during our wedding vows.

Spotted on Threads:

Looks like it’s just you and me tonight, family size Toblerone.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Dear ghosts, if you can move stuff around and flicker lights, then you can use a mop.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Fruit and vegetables expire faster when you’re the one paying for them.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny mantis quotes

New funny mantis quotes 👇

At this point of my celibacy, I can see the same colors as mantis shrimp. What do you know about blorange and gurple?

All funny mantis quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨