Wordgag 🎅

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇷 has copied:

Wish I could step out of my body and take my own damn pictures.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

Once you are able to find humor in any situation, you’ve either reached enlightenment or you’re just a little unhinged.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

Parenting sometimes feels like you’re an elevator. Lots of ups and downs and the kids love to push your buttons.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has bookmarked:

Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has copied:

Twitter is a weapon of mass distraction.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has copied:

My career goal is to be able to just delete my LinkedIn account at some point.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has copied:

I can’t blame this generation too much for doing stupid stuff. My generation thought seven Police Academy movies were a good idea.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

The free hotel blow-dryer should be easier to get off the bathroom wall.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has downloaded:

I hate the person I become when I try to open a package using the ‘Tear Here’ notch, and it stays sealed.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has copied:

Instead of meeting any new people, I would much rather un-meet the ones I already know.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

501 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,094

Funny Quotes Topics

17,246

Funny Quotes Images

15,094

Dec 22, 2025

3,618

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Pinterest:

Ninety percent of my new follows are beautiful women, which tells me one thing: I’ve still got it!

Spotted on Reddit:

I love putting on warm underwear fresh out of the dryer. Plus, it’s fun to look around the laundromat and guess who they belong to.

Making waves on Threads:

I’m giving up eating chocolate for a month. Sorry, bad punctuation. I’m giving up. Eating chocolate for a month.

Spotted on WeChat:

Strangers vomiting their beliefs all over you every day is not good for the soul.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Before social media, you had to actively go out and find crazy people.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Limbo is the only sport where being really bad at it means you’re raising the bar.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

I woke up from a deep sleep in a panic thinking I was late for work. Thankfully, I was already there.

Making waves on Slack:

In case anyone hasn’t told you today, I’m beautiful.

Making waves on Slack:

Time is precious, waste it wisely.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Some people shop for designer heels. I shop for nonstop flight deals.

Home » Funny Pencil Quotes

Funny pencil quotes

Funny pencil quotes ✏️ bring a smile to anyone who loves doodling, sketching, or just writing nonsense! Whether you’re a student, artist, or office ninja, these witty words add a splash of humor to your everyday scribbles 😂. Get ready to pencil in some laughs and sharpen your funny bone with clever lines that prove even a simple pencil can have a big personality! 😄📝

New funny pencil quotes 👇

Sharpening pencils at the bin was the biggest link-up.

0

1 month ago

bin, humor, joke, link-up, pencil, pencils, sharpening, wit
Sharpening a pencil at the bin was the childhood equivalent of taking a cigarette break.

0

1 month ago

activity, bin, break, childhood, cigarette, equivalent, humor, nostalgia, pencil, school, sharpening, taking
Isn’t it weird that we have one hand that knows how to do everything and then one hand that just sits there like ‘I don’t know how to hold a pencil.’

0

2 months ago

do everything, everything, funny observation, hand, hold, humor, i, just, know, knowledge, knows, observation, pencil, sit, weird

All funny pencil quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

49 shares on Threads this month:

Got thrown out of the grocery store for holding a rotisserie chicken up like Simba again.

78 shares on WeChat this month:

The first guy to clap after seeing something cool must have been like “what the hell am I doing?”

10 shares on Snapchat this month:

Job posting: $15/hr for master’s degree. Burrito menu: $23 for bean and cheese burrito.

59 shares on Pinterest this month:

I don’t have an advent calendar, so I’m just opening cupboard doors and eating what’s in there.

88 shares on Slack this month:

Hair is washed. I am finally lovable and capable of loving again.

63 shares on Reddit this month:

Where have you been all of my life and can you please go back there?

82 shares on Messenger this month:

What’s the best job for someone who cries very easily and cannot handle any criticism?

10 shares on Telegram this month:

Doing nothing is hard. You never know when you are done.

51 shares on TikTok this month:

“I’m not concerned about Netflix buying Warner Brothers. None of this will matter once we evolve gills and start living underwater.”

57 shares on Facebook this month:

I don’t understand people who forget to eat. I’m already planning lunch while chewing breakfast.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I think I’ma end the year with a plot twist, everyone hold on tight.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I wish I was a cat, because the fatter you are, the more people like you.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Whoever said, “Laughter is the best medicine,” clearly never tried Revenge.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I wonder if Mary and Joseph hated putting away the Christmas stuff as much as I do.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

“I read 20 books this year!” That’s nothing. I read 50,000 tweets.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Now that the nights are getting cooler again, spiders often hide in your bed in search of warmth. Sleep well!

17 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s important that everyone takes really good pictures of me this summer.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I either text back right away or never, because I saw your text, replied in my head but forgot to actually type it.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Rain cancels plans, upsetting some and delighting others.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I have read that there are imaginary pregnancies. The belly gets bigger and bigger, but there is no baby inside. Finally a diagnosis.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

501 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,094

Funny Quotes Topics

17,246

Funny Quotes Images

15,094

Updated

Dec 22, 2025

Users Online

3,993

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇼 has bookmarked:

I’m not saying Lois Lane is a bad investigative journalist, but my friend Greg didn’t wear glasses to work yesterday and I recognized him by lunch time.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

I support Bluesky in theory, but in practice, it’s like a JRPG with no bad guys.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has bookmarked:

If you like pointing out beautiful scenery to three people who are on their phones, a family road trip is for you.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has shared:

Ever woken up, kissed the person sleeping next to you and felt glad to be alive? I just did, so I won’t be catching this train again.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

I just want someone who can see through all my bullshit and hate me for who I really am.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

Gonna end every insult with “but in a good way”.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has copied:

Sometimes, fasting from people is also important.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has downloaded:

Every day I tell myself, “You got this,” and every day, “this” gets weirder.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has bookmarked:

Christmas can be really hard for single people. Everyone else is having a brilliant time and we have to hide the fact that every day is like that for us.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has copied:

But have you tried getting slow neck kisses and soft ear whispers about it?

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on WeChat:

Ponytails are only hot on women, bro.

Shared recently on Slack:

I’m just saying, no dog has ever ghosted me.

Just shared via Telegram:

If the Beatles were just 4 lads from Liverpool, imagine what 400 lads from Liverpool would sound like. But y’all aren’t ready for that conversation.

Going viral on Discord:

I need to start hiding my money from myself.

Seen just now on Slack:

If she forgives you, then 30 minutes later comes back mad again: that means she told her friends in her group chat, and the board of directors did not agree.

Going bananas on Facebook:

I like how people say “manage your depression,” like it’s a stock portfolio, but you’re heavily invested in sadness.

Spotted on Telegram:

I want a chiropractor to crack my entire body like a glow stick.

Going viral on X:

Parenthood is so crazy. We’re really out here getting bullied by the people we made.

Making waves on Reddit:

Told someone I’m as “single as a pringle and as neato as a dorito” and they blocked me immediately.

Trending via Threads:

Ants can be found on every continent except Antarctica, which is weird considering their name.

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