Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

All these microplastics in me could at least do some repair work to my knees and back while they’re in there.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has shared:

If you’re having a good day today, don’t play Wordle.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has copied:

My mom is asking each ornament, “Where do you want to live?” before putting them on the tree.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has downloaded:

I wish I loved exercise as much as I love napping 3 times a day and eating 5 times the suggested serving size.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has downloaded:

Can’t think of a single time the MGM lion advanced the plot of the movie in any way. Just needless jump scare.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

Can’t. Just put my hair in a bun and that’s just about enough exercise for today.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has viewed:

I’m so good at sleeping that I can do it with my eyes closed.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has copied:

Break-up so bad, he blocked me on Pokémon Go.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has viewed:

Sometimes I do random acts of kindness, like keeping my mouth shut, for example.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

Breakfast in bed: where your cozy blanket turns into a crumby crime scene.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,504

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via X:

Ruining the Olympics for my fiancée by, every time they mention Paris, saying, “that’s where Ratatouille lived”.

Just landed via TikTok:

My life is simple, I see a queue of more than 6 people, I go home.

Just shared via Telegram:

Whales go days, sometimes weeks at a time without giving anyone their opinion.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Some days I feel I’m on top of the world, and other days it feels like the world is on top of me.

Breaking via YouTube:

What base is it when he says, “I know you need it badly,” but he’s talking about sleep?

Just landed via Instagram:

The fact that I procrastinate and still get the job done is the reason I still procrastinate.

Making waves on Twitch:

It’s important to fuel your body with essential nutrients, which can be found in cookies, chips, and candy.

Just landed via Telegram:

This wouldn’t happen to me if I were a huge dragon.

Making waves on Reddit:

It’s not about the cards you’re dealt, but how you play the hand you’ve got hidden up your sleeve.

Seen just now on Slack:

You can always tell when someone is on a diet by how they scrape every last bit from that yogurt container.

Funny previous quotes

Funny previous quotes bring a burst of laughter 😄 and a dash of nostalgia 📜 to brighten your day! Whether you’re looking for witty comebacks or clever one-liners, these gems never fail to tickle your funny bone 😂. Perfect for sharing with friends or spicing up your captions, get ready to dive into a world where humor meets history 🌟!

New funny previous quotes 👇

Studies show young people are having less sex than previous generations. I knew I was ahead of my time.

5 days ago

ahead, ahead of time, generation, generations, having, humor, i, less, people, person, previous, sex, show, study, time, young, young person
Interviewer: “What did you learn from your previous job?” Me: “That I need a new job.”

1 week ago

career, career change, change, experience, humor, i, interviewer, job, job search, learn, me, need, new, new job, previous, search, work, work experience
I love how this generation broke the previous misconception that “people with tattoos can’t get good jobs” and now we all agree that “people with and without tattoos can’t get good jobs”.

2 weeks ago

agree, broke, employment, equality, generation, good, humor, i, job, jobs, love, misconception, people, previous, society, stereotypes, tattoo, work
In a previous life I may have been a carrier pigeon, in that all I ever think about is going home.

2 weeks ago

animals, ever, going, home, humor, i, life, longing, nostalgia, pigeon, previous, previous life, think, travel

All funny previous quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

65 shares on Slack this month:

l identify as a Christmas tree. Lit on the outside, dead on the inside.

52 shares on Instagram this month:

Money is always a motive for murder. Stay broke.

19 shares on Pinterest this month:

Adulting’s a total scam. Bills, taxes, and a laundry pile that breeds in the dark, were not in the brochure!

56 shares on Snapchat this month:

If they played poker with potato chips, I’d have a gambling problem.

31 shares on WeChat this month:

It’s now socially acceptable again to clap when the plane lands.

12 shares on TikTok this month:

If I’m too quiet you can rest assured I’m in the process of planning my sweet escape or your equally sweet demise.

17 shares on Threads this month:

Me waking up: wow, I can’t wait to go to sleep tonight.

77 shares on Telegram this month:

Used dark mode so much that I became physically repulsed when I see a white screen.

20 shares on Facebook this month:

Some people post such depressing love shit that I start to miss their exes myself!

49 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Grant me the serenity to supernaturally change the things I cannot accept.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

7 folks are currently checking 👀

The problem with meal prep is you have to eat the meal that you prepped.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Establish dominance by showing up with all your childhood trophies.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Dating someone from Twitter is like believing a stripper loves you.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I was born a boy, but according to the packaging, I identify as a family of four.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

“I’m not ordering fries, I’ll just eat some of yours!” -Former friends of mine

6 folks are currently checking 👀

“Got milk?” Buddy, I don’t even have self-esteem.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

My mom always used to tell me that I look cute when I sleep. My boss has a different opinion.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

My personal brand is being the guest at a wedding who can’t dance but puts in a noticeable effort.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

If you comment to say “No comment,” you have, in fact, commented.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Do goalies ever get lonely during a game?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,397

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇯 has viewed:

Dude, we’re gonna be treating others how we want to be treated later if you wanna pull up.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has bookmarked:

I just locked eyes with a spider. But instead of killing him I ran away and hid, so he can spend the night stressing about where I am.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has viewed:

“What’s your ETA?” do you ask the birds in the sky when they will arrive.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

Kitchen sex, because it might be your only chance of getting laid on an island this summer.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

Dear algo, please only show this post to benevolent aliens.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has shared:

Japanese cats answering the phone be like, “Meowshi meowshi.”

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

“It’s the most wonderful crime of the year!” I crooned running away with the pot of Santa’s donations.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

I have more trips planned than I have money.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has copied:

Daffodil totally sounds like an insult, you blooming daffodil.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has copied:

Eleven out of ten people are stupid.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Please pray for my husband, he’s struggling to find me.

Making waves on YouTube:

Dear women, when you’re not around we load the dishwasher properly.

Seen just now on Facebook:

What electric cars and diarrhea have in common is the fear of not making it home.

Going bananas on Messenger:

The most disturbing thing about waking up at 4 a.m. is realizing some people do this on purpose so they can exercise.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Don’t flirt with me. I’ll show up at your house and start eating all your snacks.

Shared recently on Slack:

You can generate images with your mind whenever you want. You don’t even need AI.

Live now on X:

Better to be an overthinker than an overdrinker.

Seen just now on X:

Welcome to adulthood: you’re not dying, it’s just Thursday.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

I stopped experimenting in bed after the great honey disaster of 2015.

Just landed via Messenger:

Marriage is so scary. What do you mean I can’t have my own room?

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