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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

The plan was simple: finish school, find a job and get married at 25. But now I don’t understand anything anymore.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has viewed:

Nobody lures you into a gingerbread house in the forest anymore.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has bookmarked:

Getting out of bed should count as resistance training.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has bookmarked:

Eat like your treadmill is watching.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has viewed:

“Slipping in the shower and trying to hold on to the water jet…” Shall I tell you more about myself?

Someone from 🇸🇿 has viewed:

Technically, all the money I have ever spent on food has been flushed down the toilet.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has bookmarked:

At the grocery store, but forgot my wife’s list so I guess I’ll just follow this other guy around and get what he gets.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has downloaded:

The only thing stopping cheesecake from being a breakfast food is you.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has bookmarked:

Slim Shady implies the existence of Thicc Sunny.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

I don’t drink alcohol. I like suffering raw.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

817 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,979

Funny Quotes Topics

13,919

Funny Quotes Images

10,979

21 minutes ago

3,443

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Reddit:

I concern myself with the opinions of sheep because they are cute.

Breaking via Telegram:

I’ve decided to become an organ donor. When I die, I want an elephant to get a new trunk.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

When I die, I hope I’m remembered for my ability to take any bad situation and make it worse.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I get so embarrassed for no reason after posting on social media. Like, why am I showing my life?

Trending via Twitch:

I will not accept a hint. I will act dumb until you say it clearly to me.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Facebook: because time isn’t going to pass on it’s own.

Live now on WeChat:

Sorry it took so long to text you back; my social bandwidth was buffering.

Trending via YouTube:

My sex face is the same as my first pee in three hours face.

Just landed via WeChat:

Being an adult means your pain never goes away, it just migrates to a new location in your body.

Spotted on YouTube:

All my life choices led me to this post right here, and if that’s not an indictment of free will, I don’t know what is.

Home » Funny Slow Quotes

29 Funny slow quotes

Funny slow quotes 🐢 are the perfect remedy for our fast-paced lives, bringing a touch of humor to those leisurely moments. They’re like a gentle nudge reminding us to enjoy the ride, not just the destination. Whether you’re sipping coffee ☕ or stuck in traffic 🚗, these witty gems offer a lighthearted pause and a chance to chuckle. So, slow down, embrace the humor, and let life’s little laughs unfold at their own pace.

New funny slow quotes 👇

4 days ago
Share →: I can’t wait to retire so I can get up at 6 a.m. and go drive around really slow and make everybody late for work.

Commentary:
Driving slow in the fast lane: the real retirement perk 😂🚗💨🕖
1 week ago
Share →: I can now see how sitting on a porch could fill an entire life.

Commentary:
"Who knew? My life's calling was just a rocking chair away! 🪑😂☀️"
4 weeks ago
Share →: Even wild things have slow mornings.

Commentary:
"Proof that even party animals need caffeine Mondays! ☕️🦁😴"
4 weeks ago
Share →: The Slow and the Furious: me navigating a shopping cart through a grocery store filled with morons.

Commentary:
"Coming soon to theaters near you: 'The Cart Whisperer' 🚗💨🛒 Uniting speed and patience in aisle 3!"
1 month ago
Share →: When I’m behind a slow car, I steer my car a little to the right so the people behind me can see that it isn’t my fault.

Commentary:
"Just doing my civic duty as a professional 'not-my-fault' driver! 🚗💨⬇️ #BlameTheSnail"
1 month ago
Share →: I’ve reached the age where people talk loudly and slowly to me.

Commentary:
"Welcome to the club! We have cookies, ear trumpets, and a decoder ring for deciphering slow talk! 🍪📣👂😂"
2 months ago
Share →: His voice was like whiskey. Smooth with a slow burn that lit me up from the inside.

Commentary:
"Sounds like the kind of guy who can turn a karaoke night into a full-blown concert! 🎤🔥🥃"
2 months ago
Share →: If this meeting were any slower, it’d be a landscape painting.

Commentary:
"Just waiting for Bob Ross to pop up and start narrating! 🌲🖌️😴"
2 months ago
Share →: They should invent a weekend that goes by slowly.

Commentary:
"💡 Let's call it… 'SlowMo Saturday'! Where alarm clocks take a day off too. 😂📆"
4 months ago
Share →: Yoga is just slow motion breakdancing.

Commentary:
"Who knew downward dog could be rocking out to some old school beats? 🧘‍♂️💃 Break it down, yoga style! 🎵 #YogaBreakdanceRevolution"

For even more funny slow quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny slow quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

817 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,979

Funny Quotes Topics

13,919

Funny Quotes Images

10,979

21 minutes ago

3,426

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇧 has downloaded:

I’ve heard that some people have kids who sleep through the night and I’d like to know if they use tranquilizers or chloroform.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

I always say “it’s so expensive” and then buy it nonetheless.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has downloaded:

The best thing about driving in the snow is staying home.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has viewed:

Going to the beach is 99% getting ready for the beach and 1% enjoying the beach.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has viewed:

Dr. Pepper just unseated Pepsi as the second most popular soda in America. Don’t tell me that getting your PhD isn’t worth it.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has viewed:

I’m always sad when my sandwich is over.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

I like when I walk with people and they note that I’m a fast walker. We’re in a race. We’re in a race and you’re losing actually.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has shared:

The older I get, the less surprised I’d be if a random body part just fell off one day.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has shared:

You’re confusing me with someone who cares what you think of me.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has viewed:

I didn’t just turn into a grouchy old woman overnight. It took years of people letting me down, pissing me off, and dealing with idiots to get this good at it.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Messenger:

To be fair, a dumpster is like one of the safest places to have a fire.

Just shared via Slack:

Congratulations to the people who never took their Christmas decorations down. You’re almost there.

Trending via LinkedIn:

I wish Amazon would stop finding things I might like.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Serious replies to silly posts are now illegal. Go talk to your wife.

Going viral on Reddit:

Packed all my meds into one bottle for a trip and accidentally invented the best trail mix.

Just shared via Instagram:

I would be very interested to hear from someone who is ILLEGALLY blind.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

Thanks for leaving my door open; I was running low on houseflies.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Trying is the first step toward failure.

Spotted on WeChat:

When you try to be humble and say it’s no big deal and they agree with you.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

It is only when a mosquito lands on your testicles that you realize there is always a way to solve problems without using violence.

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