82 Funny turn quotes

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  1 day ago

  Share →: Today I was in a taxi, and the taxi driver said, “I love my job. I am my own boss, nobody tells me what to do!” Then I said, “Turn left.”

  Commentary:
  That's a quick way to show him who's really in charge! 😂🚖👌

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  5 days ago

  Share →: If you’re dating an alpha female, you need to know that they need to be babied at night, or else they will turn into a dragon.

  Commentary:
  Sounds like a fire-breathing bedtime story is part of the nightly routine! 🐉🔥😴

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  6 days ago

  Share →: The agony of thinking you’re finished doing the dishes, only to turn around and, to your horror, the pot.

  Commentary:
  Just when you think you're done, the pot's like, "Surprise! I'm the boss level of dishwashing!" 😅🍲🧼

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  1 week ago

  Share →: I have no idea how people meet at the gym. I turn into a disgusting, angry swamp witch every time I exercise.

  Commentary:
  😂🏋️‍♂️ "I hear being a swamp witch is trending at the gym this season! Just rocking that 'fresh out of the cauldron' look!" 🧙‍♀️💦

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  1 week ago

  Share →: Children really brighten up a home. They never turn the lights off, …

  Commentary:
  Just like little human light bulbs who think turning off lights is a mythical legend! 💡😂👶

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  1 week ago

  Share →: I hate when I turn my car on in the morning and the music starts blasting, and I am like, “Whoooah, big fella, I’m not the same person I was last night.”

  Commentary:
  "Ha! Mornings are for whispered lullabies, not surprise concerts! 🎶😴🚗"

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  1 week ago

  Share →: I didn’t just turn into a grouchy old woman overnight. It took years of people letting me down, pissing me off, and dealing with idiots to get this good at it.

  Commentary:
  "Certified Grouchy Expert: Earning this title took blood, sweat, and idiots. 😂👵💪 #ProfessionalCrab"

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  1 month ago

  Share →: In a turn of unexpected events, I need to learn karate by tomorrow morning.

  Commentary:
  "Better start with a crash course in self-defense via YouTube! 🥋🤣📚"

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  1 month ago

  Share →: When people say, “Stop living in the past,” my thought in turn is, “But the music was so much better then!”

  Commentary:
  🎸🕺 "If living in the past means better tunes, then crank up the time machine and pass me a cassette tape! 🎶😂 #VintageVibes"

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  1 month ago

  Share →: Adulthood will turn Gmail into part of your social media routine.

  Commentary:
  "Adulting level unlocked: Reading emails is my new 'daily scroll'! 📧😂 #InboxInfluencer"

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