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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

Where do you see yourself five beers from now? What’s your five-beer plan?

Someone from 🇵🇰 has bookmarked:

Them: “Ugh, could you be more annoying?” Me: “Oh God, yes!”

Someone from 🇨🇴 has bookmarked:

Her: how are you still single? Me: it’s easier than you think.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has viewed:

You’re either really good at wrapping presents or you’re really beautiful and funny. It’s one or the other.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has bookmarked:

Of course I intermittently fast. That’s when I sleep.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has shared:

You don’t have to write every day to be a writer! You just have to feel guilty every day that you don’t.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

Whoever has my voodoo doll, please make it study.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has shared:

I’ve been doing Dry January, but it’s literally just been my lips and skin.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has bookmarked:

I’m not lazy, I’m an inactivist.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has bookmarked:

Sleep when the baby sleeps, eat when the baby eats, work when the baby works.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

793 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,955

Funny Quotes Topics

13,925

Funny Quotes Images

10,955

Updated

6 minutes ago

Users Online

3,425

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Messenger:

Dear sleep, I’m sorry we broke up this morning. I want you back!

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I’m so sick of TV shows and movies where there are no likable characters. I don’t need to spend an hour with people I hate, I already have my life.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

For Thanksgiving don’t ask me about my life, just pass me the bottle.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

My love language is being sent money.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Tomorrow isn’t promised, so eat that cake today.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

It’s hard to sleep knowing that Coke is in the fridge.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

I would rather walk directly into the ocean than tell people a fun fact about myself.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

Forget Spotify Wrapped. How many minutes did you spend listening to your girlfriend this year?

Spotted on LinkedIn:

DMs full of guys who wouldn’t know what to do with me.

Just shared via Threads:

“You’ve changed!” Yeah, I don’t like you.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

793 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,955

Funny Quotes Topics

13,925

Funny Quotes Images

10,955

Updated

6 minutes ago

Users Online

3,432

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇿 has viewed:

There is sex without love, there is love without sex, and there is me without both.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has viewed:

For Halloween I will go to the beach dressed as a french fry and let the seagulls destroy me.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has copied:

Liquor on the top shelf is so expensive because the bartender has to stand on their tippy toes to reach it.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has downloaded:

But that was my emotional support daylight.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

I was at a funeral yesterday and spiced things up by walking over to complete strangers and saying “Ignore what everyone else thinks. I, personally, have no issue with you being here”.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has bookmarked:

Schrodinger’s Immigrant: A person who is simultaneously too lazy to work, but is also stealing your job.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has downloaded:

I delete posts cause I be getting mature over the hours.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has bookmarked:

Have you guys heard of recency bias? I hadn’t, but now I’m seeing it literally everywhere. Must be a big deal.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has viewed:

If the math problems are too difficult for me, I post them online and write: “Only 1 in 10 can solve this problem.”

Someone from 🇲🇦 has downloaded:

I miss my kids the most when they go to bed and the mosquitoes go after me because they have no other options.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Reddit:

Sometimes my toddler throws stuff on the floor and then shouts “OH NO” and that’s kind of like what politicians do.

Going viral on X:

I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.

Trending via Threads:

I’ve never wished a man dead, but I’ve read some obituaries with great pleasure.

Reported on TikTok:

Well, well, well, if it isn’t the holiday traffic I said I’d avoid even though I did nothing to avoid it.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Just once I’d like to wake up, turn on the news, and hear “Monday has been cancelled,” and then go back to sleep.

Spotted on Pinterest:

I’m officially at the age where going out on the weekend just means I’m running errands.

Shared recently on Instagram:

The internet is fun because you can post about mayonnaise and somehow end up in a fight.

Trending via YouTube:

Superwoman: Single. Batman: Single. Wonder Woman: Single. I get it now, I’m single because I’m a superhero.

Going viral on Threads:

Apparently, responding to a wedding invitation with “maybe next time” is wrong. I know that now.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

Why can’t they use deep fake technology for good instead of evil? Like taking Zoom meetings for you, stuff like that.

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