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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇬 has shared:

Daylight savings is not enough. You need to be daylight investing.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has shared:

I wonder what other animals we tried to ride before discovering that horses were cool with it.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has shared:

The thing about sleep is that I’d like to get some of it.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

(Making small talk with a couple) So have you guys ever cheated on each other?

Someone from 🇳🇿 has bookmarked:

Foo fighters still fighting foo.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

The real reason for global warming is that today’s young people are nowhere near as cool as we were back then.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has bookmarked:

Remember, if you start with, “It’s crazy to think…” you can say whatever you want.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has downloaded:

I decided not to go for a run today because of the weather, but mostly because of the running.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has shared:

Unfortunately, the movie you want to watch is unavailable on your 13 streaming services. You can rent it for $2.99 though.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has bookmarked:

I am so full of love and anger, like a lava lamp.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,548

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on TikTok:

My husband is trying to convince me that we’re in a situationship. “The situation is that we live in the same house and love each other.”

Trending via Facebook:

I ain’t typing “X” into the URL bar, my wife is right behind me.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

As a beautiful woman, sometimes the most powerful thing you can say is “ew.”

Making waves on Threads:

No, you tell me what YOU were doing during that gap in my resume.

Making waves on Instagram:

Those security guards at the Samsung store are Guardians of the Galaxy.

Freshly posted on Discord:

First rule of cleaning while listening to music: the toilet brush is never the microphone. Never!

Trending via TikTok:

Babe, is everything OK? You’ve barely accomplished anything at all in your entire life.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

Set my sex robot to boyfriend mode and now it’s liking other girls’ pictures on Insta.

Just shared via Instagram:

Paid my mortgage so don’t ask me to come out. I’m getting my money’s worth.

Just landed via Messenger:

Good morning to everyone who doesn’t get on my nerves.

Funny unrequited quotes

Funny unrequited quotes turn the pain of one-sided love into a hilarious rollercoaster of laughs and eye-rolls 😂💔 Whether you’re dodging a crush or embracing the awkwardness of unreturned feelings, these witty lines bring a smile to even the most tangled hearts ❤️‍🩹✨ Ready to find humor in heartbreak? Let’s dive into the lighter side of love’s little misadventures! 😜💕

New funny unrequited quotes 👇

All funny unrequited quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
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Social Media Stars ⭐

19 shares on WhatsApp this month:

It’s cold and dark outside, made me think of you.

20 shares on X this month:

Can’t. Just put my hair in a bun and that’s just about enough exercise for today.

31 shares on Messenger this month:

Sorry for zoning out, bro. It’s just, I’ve been having a bad day for several years.

88 shares on X this month:

“Your call is very important to us. Please stay on the line until your call is no longer important to you.”

34 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Please just wait until my mating ritual is over before you decide.

24 shares on Snapchat this month:

Ladies, don’t date hungry guys. They’re just trying to get into your pantries.

44 shares on Slack this month:

What no one tells you about having kids is that within a few years you’re in possession of a lot of teeth that you have no idea what to do with.

79 shares on WeChat this month:

Going to bed early is easy, going to sleep early is a whole other set of problems.

78 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Blocking people isn’t enough. I need their favorite TV show to get cancelled.

19 shares on TikTok this month:

I be skipping everyone’s stories but watch mine like 20 times.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Big fan of calling artists their first name and then the band name as their last name.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

The best part about filling out doctor appointment forms online is when you get there and they say “hello, please fill out these forms!”

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Being a little freak is my love language.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m giving up eating chocolate for a month. Sorry, bad punctuation. I’m giving up. Eating chocolate for a month.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

There are three certainties in life: death, taxes and getting stuck behind a shit driver when you’re late.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Imagine hating me and I don’t notice.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Marriages are like pancakes. Sometimes you gotta throw the first one out.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Some people aren’t just missing a screw, the whole toolbox is gone.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I want to make fun of Kanye but I’m always losing my shit on the internet too.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I just shaved my legs and man, the next 7 minutes and 34 seconds before it starts growing back is gonna feel amazing.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,492

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇴 has viewed:

One of the most disappointing things is when you get a severe thunderstorm warning, and there is no severe thunderstorm.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has downloaded:

Remember, guys, it costs zero dollars to be annoying to strangers on the internet.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has viewed:

Summer is the best because there’s always a chance I’ll see someone trip on their own flip flop.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has shared:

Throwing “whereupon” into a few work emails today to keep it fun.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has bookmarked:

It’s messed up how us humans have to obey all these laws while bears get to eat whoever they want.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

Every time I use a Windows computer, it’s like they built malware into the OS. Like, what do you mean there are ads in the start menu?

Someone from 🇳🇪 has shared:

My keys fell in the snow, and now they’re gone forever — time to start a new life under a new name in a warmer climate.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has bookmarked:

The problem with meal prep is you have to eat the meal that you prepped.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

I can’t believe bedtime used to be a punishment.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has copied:

Sometimes I say something so embarrassing I even impress myself.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Discord:

A web developer and an SEO expert walk into a bar, bars, nightclub, pubs, tavern, beer, alcohol, drinks, alcoholic beverages, bars in my area, places to drink.

Seen just now on Threads:

Hobbies include fake smiling while waiting for people to stop talking.

Seen just now on Threads:

If you pick a movie that’s longer than the flight, the pilot gets a notification to fly around for a bit.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Some people can start a task and then just finish it instead of trying to do a hundred things at once, like a squirrel on crack.

Live now on Instagram:

My superpower? I can look you right in the eyes while you’re talking and not hear a single word you said.

Spotted on Discord:

“I’m getting to an age where I realize I shouldn’t have laughed at my grandparents for having an ‘upstairs’ vacuum.”

Going bananas on Slack:

Friends with consequences.

Making waves on Discord:

The role I play at family gatherings is that of the cousin that doesn’t show up anymore.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

One of the hardest things to do as an adult is to go back to work after a long weekend.

Seen just now on Telegram:

If the shampoo and the conditioner finish at the same time, one of them faked it.

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