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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡―πŸ‡΅ has downloaded:

If you can’t handle me at my worst just imagine how I feel.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡² has shared:

They portray Pilates like it’s this cute girly thing and it’s actually training for combat.

Someone from πŸ‡³πŸ‡Ώ has copied:

Them: I haven’t seen you in a long time. Me: You’re welcome.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡Ό has viewed:

I’m perverted, but in an elegant and whimsical way.

Someone from πŸ‡°πŸ‡Ό has viewed:

Doesn’t matter, Your Honor! I, for one, found it very funny.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡± has bookmarked:

Every girl keeps an extra boyfriend and calls him ‘best friend’.

Someone from πŸ‡ͺπŸ‡ͺ has copied:

Getting up early would be easier if we could keep our eyes closed.

Someone from πŸ‡«πŸ‡² has viewed:

If you don’t believe aliens walk amongst us, who else could write such unnatural dialogue in pharmaceutical commercials?

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡» has viewed:

Can’t wait for my husband to see what he bought everyone for Christmas.

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡­ has downloaded:

First time buying fireworks, and I wasn’t sure I’d picked the right ones until the salesman gave me a wink and high-foured me.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,488

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Just landed via Discord:

My neighbors were yelling so loud at their kids to clean up their room that out of fear even I started cleaning my room.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

I’d rather throw everything I own in the trash than try to deal with people on Facebook Marketplace.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Nothing humbles you faster than rereading something you were proud of yesterday.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Touch my butt, not my coffee.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Friendly reminder to drink your water and mind your business this week.

Live now on WeChat:

Banks should have a gold bar that you can go in and touch when you feel poor.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Thank God my pets can’t talk. They simply know too much.

Going viral on X:

The French only eat snails because they don’t like fast food.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

If I don’t reply, assume I opened your message, nodded, and then got distracted.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

If you ever get a chance to date a cute person for one day, where will you take me?

Funny virgin quotes

Funny virgin quotes are the perfect mix of humor and honesty πŸ˜„βœ¨ Whether you’re embracing your status or just love a good laugh, these witty lines will have you chuckling and nodding along πŸ™ŒπŸ’¬ Get ready for some lighthearted fun that breaks the ice and keeps things playful πŸŽ‰πŸ˜‚ Because sometimes, laughter really is the best way to celebrate every chapter of life!

New funny virgin quotes πŸ‘‡

All funny virgin quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes πŸ‘Œ

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

12 shares on Messenger this month:

I’ve just found my wide pants again. They weren’t gone at all, they’re just my tight pants now.

91 shares on Instagram this month:

People with air fryers really love to tell you what they air fry.

50 shares on WeChat this month:

There’s an app for the people who say they’re not seeking some form of validation here. It’s called a diary.

84 shares on Pinterest this month:

I stop myself at least twice a day from posting a status that would make everyone grab popcorn.

56 shares on Snapchat this month:

Microplastics are a waste of time. I go straight to eating whole packaging.

52 shares on YouTube this month:

The only thing worse than a nightmare is waking up from a great dream before you get to see how it ends.

54 shares on X this month:

Due to financial reasons, I will now be performing photosynthesis.

36 shares on Instagram this month:

No one flirts better than a guy who’s not interested in you.

35 shares on Telegram this month:

I’m not here to make friends, just noise.

15 shares on Threads this month:

Today’s politics make me think we’re living in a movie where the villains actually win.

Trending Topics πŸ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes πŸ’₯

14 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Hey girl, are you an extraterrestrial? ’Cause your husband’s out here acting like you don’t exist.

9 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

My problem is I always think I can get ready in 15 minutes when I have repeatedly proven that I can’t.

14 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Pharaohs were buried with their hands crossed over their chest because of the belief there would be countless water slides in the after life.

15 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Job market so bad, I started following my dreams.

8 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

There are only two kinds of people, and I avoid them both.

13 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

The Epstein client list but to the tune of Mambo number 5.

20 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

In my defense, they burned my grilled cheese sandwich.

24 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

The person opposite me has a donut. I do not have a donut. That should be my donut. This person is now my arch nemesis.

11 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Someone you haven’t talked to in forever will show up in your dream just to do a backflip.

13 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Jewelry stores should just be like: Whether you’re trying to be nice or trying to get laid, we got you covered.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,284

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡΅πŸ‡¦ has copied:

Laziness is the mother of all bad habits, but ultimately she is a mother, and we should respect her.

Someone from πŸ‡°πŸ‡Ό has downloaded:

Listen kid, I have social media profiles older than you.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡» has bookmarked:

Roses are red. I’m going to bed.

Someone from πŸ‡ΏπŸ‡Ό has downloaded:

Need to shave my legs again. Blow-drying takes far too long.

Someone from πŸ‡³πŸ‡± has copied:

Salt is just angry sugar.

Someone from πŸ‡­πŸ‡· has copied:

Let’s lay on the couch together, play on our phones, and ignore each other, babe.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡¦ has shared:

The fun thing about Airbnb is that you get to clean someone else’s house on your vacation.

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡¬ has downloaded:

Don’t ever forget where you came from. That’s where you left your car.

Someone from πŸ‡·πŸ‡΄ has viewed:

Declined stepping on the scale at the doctor’s office because no one needs that kind of negativity in her life.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡¨ has viewed:

I am sick and tired of going to the bathroom. It’s been forty years. It should all be out by now.

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Going viral on Instagram:

Planking is the only time we appreciate time.

Going viral on Messenger:

Most divorces are caused by a spouse eating potato chips while you try to watch TV.

Shared recently on WeChat:

I’m best man at my buddy’s second wedding. Is it appropriate to open my dinner speech with β€œWelcome back everyone”?

Shared recently on Slack:

You don’t use a semicolons correctly; you use a semicolon confidently.

Just landed via X:

It’s weird when you realize that what you thought was rock bottom was actually somewhere around rock middle.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

It’s not that I want more shoes, it’s just that they keep making them in my size.

Trending via TikTok:

The plant app says that I either watered my plant too much or not enough. Very helpful. Thanks!

Seen just now on Instagram:

I don’t have a yoga mat, but I have a Twister mat, and it’s the same thing.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

I love you to the refrigerator and back.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Big fan of the comma, just great. Like look, I just made you pause the sentence as you read it. Oh look, I just did it again.

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