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41 Funny wake up quotes

The real morning people are the ones that wake up to call radio stations.

4 days ago

I modeled my morning routine on the humble rooster. Wake up, scream, wander around.

3 weeks ago

I hate the saying: “Get up, the sun is shining!” What am I supposed to do? Photosynthesis?

1 month ago

If you get drunk and message your ex, don’t worry. When you wake up, send bitcoin ads and pretend you were hacked.

1 month ago

My superpower is to wake up more tired than I was when I fell asleep.

1 month ago

That moment your alarm clock goes off in the morning and you don’t know whether to get dressed or fake an illness.

1 month ago

Just once I’d like to wake up, turn on the news, and hear “Monday has been cancelled,” and then go back to sleep.

1 month ago

I never though I’d be the kind of person who wakes up early to exercise. I was right.

2 months ago

Forget tequila, I’m at the age where you can wake up with a hangover from Netflix.

3 months ago

My body is in shock this morning from having to wake up early and wear hard pants.

3 months ago

Woke up and immediately broke my resolution to be less sexy this year.

3 months ago

What’s the point of having sex dreams if you always wake up just when it’s getting down to business?

3 months ago

It’s too bad he never woke up and chose violence. “Bob Ross, mob boss” has a nice ring to it.

3 months ago

You ever wake up in the morning and your first thought is ‘I can’t wait to go to bed tonight’?

3 months ago

Mornings would be fine if they started later.

3 months ago

If you wake up early enough, you can go back to sleep for a few hours. Not everyone knows this.

3 months ago

I now have Taylor Swift as my alarm. Now I always wake up five minutes earlier so I don’t have to listen to it.

3 months ago

Babe, wake up, it’s stupid outside!

3 months ago

It should be illegal to take a nap and still have a headache when you wake up. Like, I shut it off and back on again, why are you still here?

3 months ago

“Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go” by “Wham” encourages you to do something you shouldn’t do.

3 months ago