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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇼 has bookmarked:

The hardest thing about chess is the other guy is always doing some shit.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has viewed:

My husband sure has a lot of opinions on which movie he’s gonna sleep through.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has bookmarked:

Sometimes, I feel like my brain is still running on Windows 95.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has bookmarked:

Ratatouille is hilarious because the villain wasn’t even evil; he just didn’t want food cooked by rats?!?

Someone from 🇭🇹 has viewed:

If you see me out in public but we haven’t talked since high school, let’s keep it that way.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has copied:

I’ve walked the walk, but nowadays I just sit the sit.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has downloaded:

Dear brain, please finally learn the difference between hunger and boredom. I’m getting fat.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has copied:

In a previous life I may have been a carrier pigeon, in that all I ever think about is going home.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

The more water you drink, the more bathroom breaks, the less you work. Stay hydrated.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has downloaded:

Cocktails can be tricky, because they taste like juice, but then the next thing you know… you can’t walk.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2271 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,433

Funny Quotes Topics

15,136

Funny Quotes Images

12,433

1 hour ago

3,432

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Instagram:

But babe, that’s my emotional support Lord of the Rings Extended Edition.

Just landed via Messenger:

Is ‘ugh’ an emotion? Because I fell it all the time.

Making waves on TikTok:

Who called it America and not the fast food and the furious?

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Automated phone system: To speak to a representative, please enter the first twelve digits of pi.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Matcha. Dubai chocolate. Jealousy. Green is back in a big way, and likely due to deforestation.

Breaking via Pinterest:

When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that’s amore. When you swim in the sea and an eel bites your knee, that’s a moray.

Spotted on Pinterest:

If we’re walking together, just know I’ll definitely bump into you because I can’t walk in a straight line.

Just landed via Facebook:

The new American dream is an alien invasion.

Spotted on Slack:

My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, and I’m like, cool, can one of you reach the top shelf for me.

Trending via Threads:

I successfully avoided the red-eye flight and got the much milder pink eye flight.

Home » Funny Wake Up Quotes

60 Funny wake up quotes

Funny wake up quotes are the perfect way to start your day with a smile 😄 and a giggle 🤭. Whether you’re a morning person or someone who hits snooze a dozen times ⏰, these hilarious sayings will have you leaping out of bed 😂. Get ready to embrace the chaos of morning hair and mismatched socks 🧦 with a chuckle. After all, laughter is the best way to shake off those sleepy vibes and face the day ahead! 🌞

New funny wake up quotes 👇

3 days ago
Share →: Maybe somewhere in a parallel universe, I wake up feeling refreshed and energetic each day.

Commentary:
In that universe, I bet caffeine is the one that needs me to wake up! ☕️😂✨
5 days ago
Share →: The worst person to share a room with is someone who puts on 10 alarms 2 mins apart each, and wakes up at none.

Commentary:
Sounds like their alarm is just doing cardio while they stay in hibernation mode 😴⏰🏃‍♂️
5 days ago
Share →: Cats love to wake you up and go back to sleep. It’s part of their culture.

Commentary:
I'm convinced cats have an alarm clock labeled "human disturbance" ⏰😹🐾
1 week ago
Share →: Every morning I wake up and think I have a hangover, but then I realize I didn’t drink, and this is just how I feel now.

Commentary:
When even your mornings are doing a stand-up routine 🤣☕😴
1 week ago
Share →: I hate when someone you love says mean things like, “It’s time to wake up.”

Commentary:
When your alarm clock turns into your arch-nemesis, betrayal level 100 😂⏰😴
2 weeks ago
Share →: Love crawling into bed like it’s a spa retreat, only to wake up like I survived a bar fight.

Commentary:
Woke up feeling like my pillow tried karate on me last night! 🛏️🥊😴
2 weeks ago
Share →: Just because I’m up sharing posts at 7 a.m. doesn’t mean I’m up. Don’t call my phone.

Commentary:
Still buffering in the morning like a Wi-Fi connection in the basement 😂📱🌛
3 weeks ago
Share →: My daughter’s morning alarm is less to wake her up, and more to warn the rest of us.

Commentary:
Sounds like her alarm clock is more of a "brace yourself" signal for everyone else! 😅🔔📢
3 weeks ago
Share →: How can I be expected to get out of bed when I don’t want to?

Commentary:
Me trying to get out of bed is like a sloth attempting a sprint 🛌🏃‍♂️💤
3 weeks ago
Share →: Went to bed with wet hair and woke up looking like I might know a lot about astrophysics.

Commentary:
Sounds like you've unlocked the secret to waking up with a galaxy brain! 🚀🤯✨

For even more funny wake up quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny wake up quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2271 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,433

Funny Quotes Topics

15,136

Funny Quotes Images

12,433

1 hour ago

3,448

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇺 has shared:

An escape room, but it’s a bean bag chair in a hammock on a water bed in a bouncy house and you’re over 40. Good luck!

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

All income is disposable if you’re brave enough.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has bookmarked:

“November Rain” is just 9 minutes of me realizing I’m too dramatic to date someone with healthy coping skills.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

One of the top features of squirrels, for me, has got to be that squirreliness.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has downloaded:

My level of sarcasm’s gotten to a point where I don’t even know if I’m kidding or not.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has downloaded:

Me pulling into a full parking lot: Don’t these people have homes?

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

I was an ugly baby. It’s been downhill since then.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has viewed:

Yes, I was behind the DJ booth, but only as a cultural anthropologist.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

I’m still annoyed that you can catch Covid more than once. I can’t explain why, but it feels kind of rude.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has viewed:

Jump to recipe is the closest thing we have to teleportation.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on X:

Some people are like sunglasses: your day just becomes so much brighter when you accidentally drop them off the side of the boat.

Reported on YouTube:

My dating checklist is down to “not the Unabomber”.

Shared recently on Instagram:

She is so narcissistic that her narcissism has narcissism.

Shared recently on Telegram:

I am so incredibly tired today. I think my shelf life has expired.

Live now on WhatsApp:

Still can’t believe America has a federal holiday to celebrate the hit movie Independence Day.

Breaking via X:

Salad was likely invented after someone picked everything they didn’t like out of their meal and put it on a separate plate.

Shared recently on Discord:

I’m homeless. Minus the ‘m’.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

I’m so single right now, I can’t even spell relayshaunship.

Going viral on Slack:

Some of you aren’t reading the room. Not even listening to the room on audiobook.

Trending via Slack:

I suppose the supreme discipline for ninjas is sneaking up with flip flops.

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