75 Funny wake up quotes

• I miss you when I wake up before you.

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  1 week ago

  affection, before, early, early morning, i, longing, love, miss, missing, morning, relationship, wake, wake up

• It amazes me how many battles in the first two years of the Civil War were decided by which side woke up the earliest.

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  1 week ago

  battle, battles, civil, civil war, early, early morning, history, humor, me, morning, side, strategy, wake, wake up, war, war strategy, woke

• No, babe, your 10-minute incremental alarms starting a full hour before you actually get up only make me love you more.

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  1 week ago

  actually, alarm, alarm clock, annoyance, babe, before, clock, full, hour, humor, love, me, morning, only, partner, relationship, sarcasm, starting, wake, wake up

• You ever wake up from your dreams impressed? Like, damn, that narrative structure was phenomenal.

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  1 week ago

  analysis, dream, dream analysis, dreams, ever, humor, impressed, narrative, narrative structure, sleep, structure, wake, wake up

• Every morning I wake up and make the worst possible time management decisions anyone has ever made.

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  1 week ago

  anyone, decision, decisions, ever, every, humor, i, management, morning, procrastination, self-deprecation, time, time management, wake, wake up, worst, worst decision

• Beds are always the coziest when it’s time to get up and you don’t want to.

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  1 week ago

  always, bed, beds, comfort, cozy, morning, reluctance, sleep, time, wake, wake up, want

• The worst person to share a room with is someone who puts on 10 alarms 2 mins apart each, and wakes up at none.

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  1 week ago

  2, alarm, annoyance, apart, morning, none, person, room, roommate, share, sleep, someone, wake, wake up, worst

• Cats love to wake you up and go back to sleep. It’s part of their culture.

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  1 week ago

  back, behavior, cat, cats, culture, love, pet, pet behavior, sleep, wake, wake up

• Every morning I wake up and think I have a hangover, but then I realize I didn’t drink, and this is just how I feel now.

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  1 week ago

  drink, every, feel, feeling, hangover, humor, i, just, morning, realize, self-deprecating, think, wake, wake up

• I hate when someone you love says mean things like, “It’s time to wake up.”

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  1 week ago

  hate, humor, i, love, mean, mean thing, relationship, someone, thing, things, time, wake, wake up

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