192 Funny wit quotes

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5 months ago
Share →: I never forget a face, but in your case, I’ll be glad to make an exception.

Commentary:
Oh, the savagery! 🙈🤣 Looks like someone's sense of humor is as sharp as their memory! 🧠🤭 Just imagine the hilarity of selective amnesia in social situations! 😆👀 #Burnnnnn 🔥
5 months ago
Share →: If she replies to your sarcasm with more sarcasm, that’s a whole life.

Commentary:
Ah, the art of sarcasm, the language of those who don't suffer fools gladly! 🧐 When sarcasm begets even more sarcasm, it's like entering an endless loop of wit! 🔄💬 Who needs flowers and chocolates when you've got a partner in sarcasm crime for life? 😂✨ #SarcasmGoals
5 months ago
Share →: If you’ve seen one shopping centre, you’ve seen a mall.

Commentary:
Ah, the thrilling world of shopping centers! 🛍️ Did you hear about the sequel? "If you’ve seen one parking lot, you’ve seen a mall too." 😂 It's all about that deja-mall feeling! 🤣 #MallMadness
5 months ago
Share →: I did not attend his funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.

Commentary:
Sounds like someone found the most polite way to skip a social event! 💁‍♂️✉️ It's like saying, "Sorry I couldn't make it, but I'm totally on board with the whole funeral thing!" 😄 #SendingGoodVibesFromADistance
5 months ago
Share →: Keep your friend’s toast and your enemy’s toaster.

Commentary:
"Solid advice in a breakfast crisis – stay close to your friend's tasty toast 🍞 and keep a safe distance from your enemy's potentially sabotaging toaster! 🔥😄 #BreakfastStrategies"
5 months ago
Share →: I don’t have a favorite vampire. If you ask me, they all suck.

Commentary:
Oh, fangs for sharing your biting opinion! 🧛🏻‍♂️ Looks like you're not a fanpire of vampires… they can be quite draining, can't they? 💉🦇 But hey, at least they always leave their mark! 😆 #VampirePuns
5 months ago
Share →: To call you stupid would be an insult to stupid people!

Commentary:
"Wow, calling you stupid would be a disservice to all the stupid people out there 🤯🤭 Maybe we should come up with a whole new category for you! 😂"
5 months ago
Share →: The nice thing about egotists is that they don’t talk about other people.

Commentary:
"Ah, the rare silver lining of dealing with egotists – their self-centeredness serves as a shield against all the gossip and drama! 😂🙌 It's like having a VIP pass to a one-person show, starring themselves. 🌟 #EgoOnPoint"
5 months ago
Share →: Never miss a good chance to shut up.

Commentary:
Why waste your breath when silence can speak volumes? 🤐💬 Sometimes the best words are the ones left unspoken. Take a pause, let your silence do the talking! 🤫👀
5 months ago
Share →: I dunno how to flirt but I can insult you so nicely.

Commentary:
"Flirting 101: Step 1 – Master the art of insults with style 😏🔥 Step 2 – Hope they appreciate your unique charm! 😉💬 #SmoothOperator"