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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇯 has downloaded:

Can’t, holding a grudge.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has copied:

It’s completely absurd that Silicon Valley is pushing AI on us before they figured out how to keep fries fresh for longer.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has bookmarked:

Good morning to everyone except the baristas who don’t tighten the lid.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has shared:

Why would I take the high road when I could take the psychopath?

Someone from 🇲🇬 has viewed:

It’s Sunday. I’ve slept in and ignored church. Somewhere the devil is sitting and clicking on “Like”.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

Extrovert self made too many plans and now introvert self is pissed.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has bookmarked:

I unload the dishwasher backwards… just to feel something.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has shared:

Not right now. I’m manifesting.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has viewed:

Monsters can’t hide under my bed. That’s where my cats have their fight club.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has viewed:

Sorry, I just saw your text from last night. Are you guys still at the restaurant?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,451

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

I took the road less traveled. Where am I?

Live now on Twitch:

True bravery is getting a text from a woman with three questions in it, and only responding to one.

Spotted on Slack:

“Fries or salad?” sums up every adult decision you have to make.

Seen just now on Threads:

Rorschach tests are like so easy. Everything’s either a demon or a butterfly and it’s up to you to decide.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Sometimes I wonder if the plot ever gets tired of being twisted.

Just shared via Slack:

Tested positive for being single af

Trending via Reddit:

So basically, companies pay YouTube to show ads, and we pay YouTube to not show ads.

Making waves on Pinterest:

I’m attracted to people that no one pays attention to.

Making waves on Facebook:

Everything is awful, and no one is going to save you from this treacherous world. Oops, I mean, happy Friday!

I have three full closets of nothing to wear.

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I have three full closets of nothing to wear.
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Commentary:
👗 "I have three full closets of nothing to wear" – the eternal struggle of every fashionista! It's like staring into a closet full of clothes and feeling like you have absolutely nothing to put on 🤷‍♀️ Time for a wardrobe intervention or maybe just a shopping spree in disguise! 💸🛍️ #FashionistaProblems

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

95 shares on Facebook this month:

“I could see myself living here,” I said, in a different city for more than 24 hours.

12 shares on Pinterest this month:

Have come to the devastating realization that I am an over-nodder on video calls.

83 shares on Threads this month:

My new drivers license arrived and when I opened it, I gasped. How’d they get a picture of my mother?

40 shares on Pinterest this month:

If cats could send Christmas cards, they wouldn’t.

75 shares on LinkedIn this month:

You give a man your heart and he’s gonna put it under another girl’s picture.

17 shares on Threads this month:

Men be like “I would do anything for you,” and then do nothing.

12 shares on Reddit this month:

Forgot how fun it is to post IG stories. I feel like a female filmmaker.

19 shares on Instagram this month:

If you’re lost in the woods, start talking loudly about politics. Someone will come to argue with you.

32 shares on Threads this month:

You can’t convince me that 2020 didn’t open a portal to hell that we’re still living in.

20 shares on Slack this month:

Actually, it’s illegal to be upset if you make a date on Halloween and they ghost you.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I did the math and a second job would help me get out of debt as long as I start it twelve years ago.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

People call me a “Trekkie,” but I’m not. I’ve only seen Star Wars a couple of times.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I like to do a task by worrying about it for three weeks and then finally dedicating 10 solid minutes to completing it.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

When you’re a parent, your skincare routine is just the steam from the dishwasher when you open it to find the coffee cup you just needed.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

“AI is coming for your job.” Yeah, I’d like to see AI drink 11 coffees, then have a panic attack.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t worry, I’m only dead inside from the waist up.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

God, please, for once in my life, let me get what I want.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

A McRib killed my tapeworm.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Drinking coffee because hitting people over the head with a shovel is frowned upon.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s way too easy to lie online. I was just telling Beyoncé about that the other day.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,229

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

Thinking about taking some time off to focus on cheese.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has bookmarked:

Are there any medium rappers? They’re always Big or Lil.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

The week before your period doesn’t make any sense… until you realize it’s the week before your period.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

Traffic is the fault of the guy immediately in front of you.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has bookmarked:

We’ve all at least once caught our toes when putting on our knickers and jumped around the room like idiots.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has copied:

If you can’t handle me at my weirdest, then leave, because it gets weirder.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has copied:

All of my passwords are protected by short-term memory loss.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

I was born tired, and I will die tired. If I ever tell you I’m not tired, I’m probably lying.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has copied:

I miss when you could touch a TV and feel its fur.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

You know what part I love about waking up? None of it. Let me sleep!

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Instagram:

Insane that you have to defend yourself at the end of the Ph. D.! Why are you attacking me? I’m so tired.

Live now on Discord:

When they ask “how was your weekend?” answer “better than yours” and maintain eye contact.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

The “Wooooooooo” track from sitcoms should play whenever you kiss someone in real life.

Just shared via Reddit:

Some people are like sunglasses: your day just becomes so much brighter when you accidentally drop them off the side of the boat.

Going viral on Instagram:

They probably killed the first few people whose eyes turned red in a photograph before they realized it wasn’t any demon stuff.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

My boss denied me a raise before my shift today. What’s some music you have never wanted to hear in a coffee shop?

Just shared via Twitch:

Blocking someone isn’t enough; I need their PornHub videos to always buffer, just as they’re about to climax.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Stop using ChatGPT. You got a question, you come to me first.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Do you think birds, once they get older, start people-watching?

Shared recently on Reddit:

Once you are able to find humor in any situation, you’ve either reached enlightenment or you’re just a little unhinged.

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