Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇲 has bookmarked:

I’m not saying I’m old, but when I was in school, we made our parents ashtrays for Christmas.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has downloaded:

A fly swatter, but for close talkers.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has copied:

Please don’t dm me with the intention of dating me. You deserve less.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has shared:

You are what you eat! (If anyone needed more encouragement to eat the rich.)

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

Roses are red. Daisies are white. I’m in a grumpy mood. My underwear is too tight.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

If you’re thinking what I’m thinking, you need professional help.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

Imagine being a bald vampire and every time you walk by a mirror your toupée is just floating.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has viewed:

The name Ella is short for Mozzarella.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has shared:

Dear autocorrect, that’s not what I was trying to say. I’m getting tired of your shirt.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

I have three full closets of nothing to wear.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

219 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,488

Funny Quotes Topics

17,559

Funny Quotes Images

15,488

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,489

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Threads:

Please don’t delete your post. Yes, it was pretty stupid, but my reply to it was a masterpiece.

Spotted on Messenger:

Just a little reminder to laugh as much as you can, stay hydrated, and don’t let shitty people kill your vibe.

Trending via Messenger:

Raise your hand if you’ve ever tried to breathe quieter while walking up a hill so strangers didn’t call 911.

Trending via Instagram:

I love being a girly girl and going to sleep all moisturized, juicy, and soft. Lip balm on. Layering on scents just to beauty rest.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Sometimes it’s not a secret, it’s just none of your business.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

I bet before the band got popular, Barenaked Ladies concerts had a lot of pissed off attendees.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Why the hell is my laundry bin always full? I’m not even going anywhere.

Spotted on TikTok:

“You’re like cherry lip gloss. I just can’t get enough.”

Trending via Snapchat:

Never underestimate the healing power of not watching the news.

Trending via Reddit:

I could never be an Instagram mom influencer. For starters, I wouldn’t be able to give my kids a name like Banjo or Parmesan or Chandelier.

I’m not crazy, I’m just mentally spicy.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Who needs boring when you can be mentally spicy! 🌶️🧠 Stay flavorful, my friends! 😜"

crazy, fun, humor, just, mentally, personality, self-description, spicy

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

There are two types of people in the world, those who have to go to Walmart, and those who get to go to Walmart.

0

2 months ago

activity, choices, experience, fun, fun activity, humor, life, life choices, people, perspective, retail, retail experience, shopping, types, types of people, Walmart, world
“There’s a particular type of insufferability that rich people from poor countries have, that I don’t yet fully know how to verbalize.”

0

5 months ago

country, cultural, cultural difference, difference, humor, i, insufferability, know, observation, particular, people, person, poor, poor country, rich, rich person, social, social observation, type
I bought a calming tea but the smell and taste is making me nervous.

0

2 months ago

beverage, calming, humor, i, irony, making, me, nervous, relaxation, smell, taste, tea
I have more trips planned than I have money.

0

2 months ago

budget, finance, humor, i, money, planned, planning, travel, trip
Behind every great tweet is a person rolling their eyes.

0

2 months ago

behind, every, eye, eye roll, eyes, great, humor, media, person, roll, rolling, sarcasm, social, social media, tweet
I touched grass today, and I’m still like this. Please advise.

0

2 months ago

activity, grass, health, humor, i, media, mental, mental health, outdoor, outdoor activity, please, relatable, social, social media, still, today

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

82 shares on WhatsApp this month:

The day I start waking up early it’s over for you all.

78 shares on Instagram this month:

Work from home ain’t for everyone. I, for one, hate when my coworkers try to message when I’m shopping.

24 shares on Messenger this month:

If you’re thinking what I’m thinking, you need professional help.

36 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The most avoidant man you know is somewhere telling someone he’s a lover boy.

22 shares on WeChat this month:

I’m not accepting the bare minimum; I need you to shake it to the max.

61 shares on YouTube this month:

Men microdose bicuriousness by asking what you’d do for a million dollars.

23 shares on Snapchat this month:

My husband loves it when he orders fries, I say I don’t want any, and then I swoop in on his like a seagull at the beach.

18 shares on Instagram this month:

“Don’t let me keep you!” Translation: Please go.

21 shares on Threads this month:

If you’re worried that you added too much cheese to the recipe, I am here to reassure you that you did not.

12 shares on Threads this month:

Police cars should play ice cream truck music when they’re pulling you over for something minor.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇭 has downloaded:

December, give me a sweet ending for this year please.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

“I’m doing better than my parents at my age. They had, like, no followers.”

Someone from 🇨🇿 has bookmarked:

I always knew I’d get old. How fast it happened was a bit of a surprise though.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

An Advent Calendar for adults but behind every door is a different kind of anxiety medication.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

The main cause of immigration is we’re still a country where people want to go, but we’re working on fixing that.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

Nobody supports you like that one internet friend you’ve never met.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has copied:

I don’t miss calls, I stare at them.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

If my neighbors keep fighting like this, I might need to cancel some of my streaming services.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has viewed:

Thanksgiving should be called Feaster.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has shared:

Not eating the cookie I’m craving. I better wake up skinny tomorrow.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on YouTube:

The sun really clocks out for the day before I do. That’s insane.

Making waves on YouTube:

Bacon should be free for anyone having a bad day.

Making waves on Slack:

Sitting in a room with my husband and kids… Suddenly I realize everyone here has been in my vagina. Wow.

Just shared via TikTok:

Apparently, “I just don’t want to” is not a valid reason when your boss asks you why you’re not coming in today.

Going viral on WeChat:

Later is the best time to do anything.

Just landed via Instagram:

Every time I see a couple riding a tandem bike, I try to figure out which one of them is pissed about it.

Broadcasted on Threads:

I wish I could be as excited about being awake as my dog is about me being awake.

Seen just now on Threads:

Just because it’s a bad idea doesn’t mean that it ain’t gonna be a hell of a lot of fun.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

I hate it when you ask what you thought was a simple question in a meeting at work, and it turns into another meeting.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Canceled a date for a date with another guy, and that guy canceled. It’s what I deserve.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I’m not crazy, I’m just mentally spicy.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

There are two types of people in the world, those who have to go to Walmart, and those who get to go to Walmart.

“There’s a particular type of insufferability that rich people from poor countries have, that I don’t yet fully know how to verbalize.”

I bought a calming tea but the smell and taste is making me nervous.

I have more trips planned than I have money.

Behind every great tweet is a person rolling their eyes.

I touched grass today, and I’m still like this. Please advise.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨