Trendy Funny Quotes

  • People that tell us what sex gods they are, what do you want us to do with that information?
  • I used to party all night. Now I check the weather forecast for the next day to see if it’s a good laundry day.
  • I’m a Leo so I just eat the other astrological signs.
  • I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.
  • A funny thing about the Heimlich Maneuver is that it’s impossible to pronounce if you’re choking.
  • Have y’all tried calories? They’re so good.