Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇻 has downloaded:

Arguing through text will have you standing in one spot for 40 mins.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has downloaded:

My favorite pastime is looking for meaning where there is none.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has bookmarked:

I’m going to start reading books again, as soon as I finish the internet.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has downloaded:

Social media is a great way to make new enemies.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has bookmarked:

If there is a God and He “loves” us, then explain snakes.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has viewed:

I wish other jobs let us solve issues by releasing diss tracks. Got some sick rhymes about Debbie from accounting and her poorly structured invoicing.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has shared:

Piñatas are a fun way to intentionally maim the guests at your party.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

What’s it called when you mentally want to be horny but you’re physically not at all?

Someone from 🇨🇷 has viewed:

Do people exist who manage to wash, dry, fold, and put away their laundry in the same day?

Someone from 🇧🇦 has bookmarked:

Stop telling people to grow up. Have you seen adults?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

244 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,513

Funny Quotes Topics

17,581

Funny Quotes Images

15,513

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,253

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I’m so old, I still drink my coffee at home in the morning. From a real cup.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Someone asked me what my hobby was and I realized that my favorite hobby is doing absolutely nothing.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Since it’s impossible to know which period of my life is the middle, I’ve decided to have an ongoing crisis.

Live now on Snapchat:

Please respond to my telepathic messages.

Shared recently on Reddit:

I asked myself if I was toxic and we said no.

Seen just now on Discord:

Making a cult with only intuitive introverts so we can all sit in silence, side-eyeing each other suspiciously.

Just shared via X:

Your call is really important to us but first enjoy this clarinet number for the next seventy five minutes.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Today is a wonderful day to leave me alone.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Whoever thinks money doesn’t buy happiness can deposit it in my bank account.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Common sense is like deodorant. The people who need it most never use it.

No, I don’t want to read the article first, I want to argue now.

0
No, I don’t want to read the article first, I want to argue now.
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Commentary:
Looks like someone skipped a step in the logical process and went straight for the emotional rollercoaster! 🎢🤷‍♂️ Who needs facts and information when you have strong opinions, right? 💬💥 Maybe we should consider introducing an "Argue First, Ask Questions Later" policy for added sassiness! 😉👩‍⚖️

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

61 shares on Twitch this month:

People tell introverts to talk more and get out of their comfort zone, but no one tells extroverts to shut up to make the zone comfortable.

97 shares on Facebook this month:

God saw you do that.

97 shares on Twitch this month:

Sorry, I’m late. I got here when I wanted to.

97 shares on Twitch this month:

The ideal girlfriend breaks your heart, so you go on to do great things.

14 shares on Telegram this month:

This cannot be the cost of living after Jesus paid it all.

92 shares on Telegram this month:

To cut the long story short, I have spent all my money.

78 shares on Telegram this month:

Welcome to Netflix. We have everything but what you want to watch.

63 shares on X this month:

Ah, summer. When my non-consensual relationship with mosquitoes begins.

11 shares on Slack this month:

Hmm, that’s a bit too harsh. Let me put “lol” at the end of it.

58 shares on YouTube this month:

Ever look at someone and think you could spend the rest of your life saying “What?” to this person?

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

9 folks are currently checking 👀

In medieval Europe, it was pretty easy to amass vast armies eager to go into battle and have their heads chopped off because no one wanted to be alive in medieval Europe.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I cannot definitively say, even after all I’ve seen, that I would not visit Jurassic Park.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Pepsi & Coca-Cola can’t even be in the same restaurant… and we want world peace.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I tried to take a picture of myself in the shower, but my camera kept fogging up. I have selfie steam issues.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I fractured my laziness and dislocated my interest.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Statistically speaking, on average, a person has two arms, two legs, one testicle, and one ovary.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Washing my hands in the sink and then wiping them on my cat, like a towel.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate it when some random company refers to me as their “customer.” I’m like, look, we had one night of drunken shopping, we are not in a relationship.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

This is the dumbest apocalypse ever.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

No one my age is single because they’re all unhappily married.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

244 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,513

Funny Quotes Topics

17,581

Funny Quotes Images

15,513

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,498

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇩 has viewed:

You feel me? Bro, I haven’t felt anything since the Scholastic Book Fair.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has bookmarked:

I admire how, when babies don’t want to hold something anymore, they just drop it.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has viewed:

And what do we do when we are sad? “Add to cart”

Someone from 🇸🇱 has bookmarked:

Probably the most humiliating thing that can happen when you die is that you come back as a fitted-sheet ghost.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has viewed:

The T in depression stands for the therapy places that are immediately available.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

I decided not to go for a run today because of the weather, but mostly because of the running.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has downloaded:

I’m not lazy, I’m an inactivist.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

The police said I was a ‘suspect’, but I prefer being called a ‘person of interest’.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has copied:

I can’t finish cleaning up my room because I get distracted by all of the cool stuff I find.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

Me (young, naive): “I hope something good happens.” Me (now): “I hope whatever bad happens is at least funny.”

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Messenger:

They should invent a good thing that happens.

Making waves on Threads:

Twitter is fun because you can tweet about hashbrowns and someone will say you are responsible for genocide.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth. Then it’s a soap opera!

Just landed via Slack:

Sorry for not keeping in touch. I literally have nothing to say.

Live now on Telegram:

I thought I wanted a career. Turns out all I wanted is paychecks.

Spotted on Facebook:

I wonder if the sun also takes pictures of humanity going down?

Seen just now on Pinterest:

He’s a 10, but it’s the pain scale.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Don’t let anyone treat you like pond water. You are Fiji water, okay?

Seen just now on Pinterest:

“I asked ChatGPT.” Okay, well, I asked my mom.

Going viral on Twitch:

Roses are red, I’m staying in bed. I’ve made no plans, besides pretending I’m dead.

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