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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇮 has viewed:

To me, essential oils are what drips out of tacos.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has downloaded:

Imagine marrying an old man for money and you die first.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

The biggest joke on mankind is that computers have started asking humans to prove that they are not robots.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has downloaded:

You give a man your heart and he’s gonna put it under another girl’s picture.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has viewed:

It’s crazy how social media convinced us that 15 likes aren’t enough. Imagine 15 people in real life telling you that you looked good.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

I love you in a way that would worry a therapist and thrill a poet.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has viewed:

Do you think working at Pizza Hut would help you get a job at Sunglass Hut? You know, with all that hut experience?

Someone from 🇨🇬 has shared:

Dear brain, please stop thinking so much exactly when it’s time to fall asleep.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has bookmarked:

I’m full of rage, but in a very chill and nonchalant way.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has shared:

I only have one wish in life… For all my dreams to come true.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,498

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Discord:

Is Craigslist still around, or did everyone over there get murdered?

Broadcasted on Facebook:

I’d be less aggressive in the morning if I could drive to work in a tank.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Having no one to talk would get you a good sleeping schedule.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Cleaning out your camera roll is like the biggest chore ever.

Just landed via Telegram:

I’m clumsy but there are upsides. For example, if I finish my chips and I’m sad there’s no more chips, I look in my lap and I always find chips.

Just landed via TikTok:

I never finish what I start. I have a black belt in partial arts.

Shared recently on Slack:

I’ve never been kissed under the cameltoe or whatever it’s called.

Freshly posted on Slack:

If Pokémon were real, state fairs would serve them deep fried on a stick.

Just shared via Twitch:

Another Netflix price increase? Guess we’re only chilling now.

Just landed via Facebook:

A little sign under the doorbell that says, “think twice, adventurer.”

Nothing more dangerous than an ignorant man who thinks he is a genius.

2 weeks ago

Clever quote highlighting the irony of overconfidence in ignorance, humorous and witty.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Oh, the dreaded combo of ignorance and arrogance! 🤦‍♂️ It's like a recipe for disaster served with a side of misguided confidence. 🤯 Watch out for those self-proclaimed geniuses who couldn't tell the difference between a duck and a chicken! 🦆🐔 #IgnoranceIsNotBliss

confidence, dangerous, false, false confidence, genius, humor, ignorant, ignorant man, irony, man, nothing, self-awareness

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Social Media Stars ⭐

28 shares on Discord this month:

When I feel stupid, I like to remind myself that I got my bachelor’s degree without ChatGPT.

80 shares on Snapchat this month:

We argue about where to go for dinner for so long, it eventually becomes an argument on where to go for breakfast.

88 shares on YouTube this month:

Being lazy has its advantages. I still have most of my winter fat from last year.

59 shares on X this month:

Your suitcase just texted. It’s getting bored.

19 shares on Telegram this month:

My wife screamed “you haven’t listened to a single word I’ve said, have you?!” I was taken aback, what a weird way to start a conversation.

51 shares on Telegram this month:

Fyi, if you like listening to “rain sounds,” they’re almost all recordings of chicken being fried.

47 shares on Telegram this month:

Peeling a sweaty sports bra off counts as aerobic exercise, right?

34 shares on Twitch this month:

My personal brand is being the guest at a wedding who can’t dance but puts in a noticeable effort.

26 shares on WeChat this month:

Please don’t celebrate April Fool’s day if you’re not a fool. My culture is not your costume.

71 shares on Twitch this month:

I like my music at a volume where I can’t hear you.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Am I just getting older, or are people getting more annoying?

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Saying “This reminds me of my early work,” as I walk past a Rothko.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes I’ll do a random act of kindness, like keeping my mouth shut, for example.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

What is the morning wood equivalent for women, and why do I always have it?

15 folks are currently checking 👀

My teen would like you to know I ruined her life when I did her laundry today.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

God, I was so happy when I was 18. I wasn’t at the time, but in retrospect I was.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

My social circle is so small that when the phone rings, I know it’s scammers.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s called a “sports car” because getting out of one after 40 is a physical event.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

What would boomers do without their paper shredder?

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Me, when a 25-year-old talks to me: please be patient with me, I’m from the 1900s.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,704

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇷 has copied:

The guy that said laughter is the best medicine obviously wasn’t suffering from diarrhea.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has shared:

The only exercise I’ve done this month is running… out of money!

Someone from 🇲🇨 has downloaded:

My secret talent is turning any situation into a considerably more awkward one.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

People out there having five-year plans, and here I am waking up just hoping I remember what day it is.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has copied:

I am awake. Please respect my privacy during this difficult time.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

I get ignored so much, my name should be “terms and conditions”.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

When I trip, I always look back to see who or what did it, because it couldn’t have possibly been my fault.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has viewed:

People will scroll on their phones for 6 hours a day and wonder how other people can watch a movie every day.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has viewed:

In my house the roles are reversed cause my kids tell me to turn my music down.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has downloaded:

Hand sanitizer will find a cut you didn’t even know you had.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Discord:

“I’m just a girl!” No, you are a monster.

Just landed via Reddit:

So tired of looking in my wallet and not finding $10,000

Going viral on Telegram:

Get off the internet and go sniff a flower.

Breaking via Twitch:

Always tell people different stories about yourself, so when they talk about you, they’ll argue.

Just landed via Threads:

It’s so funny when someone writes a song to try to get someone to have sex with them. That’s what a bird would do!

Breaking via Threads:

The most dangerous part of your 50s is those first few steps after prolonged sitting.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Why can’t hackers just delete everyone’s bad debt, credit, and mortgages?

Shared recently on Pinterest:

If sex was strictly meant for procreation, why did God make it feel so good?

Trending via WhatsApp:

The “-ification” essay pandemic.

Live now on WhatsApp:

The first thing you learn to draw in art school is money from your parents bank account.

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